Ezekiel Survives WWE Cuts

Ezekiel Elias WWE releases

Pittsburgh, PA – After the release of 20 WWE and NXT Superstars, fans were shocked to see that little-seen wrestler Ezekiel was still employed. Although Elias was fired, his brother still currently has a place in WWE.

“They WWE may no longer want to walk with Elias, but they still want to hear Zeke speak!” gloated the clean-shaven Superstar as he collected another paycheck. “Instead of following in my brother’s footsteps, I’m going to follow Lanny Poffo’s in WCW. Stay home. Stay quiet. Stay paid. I have to make sure my parents Ernie, Jr., Eloise, and my younger brother Elrod are taken care of now that there’s only one breadwinner in the family.”

When asked about Ezekiel remaining on the active roster, WWE head Vince McMahon said “I love Big E!” After being corrected by an assistant, McMahon corrected himself by saying “Ezekiel Jackson is great too!”

While there are no current plans to use the Superstar, WWE officials hope that he achieves as much success as fellow roster spot holder-ons Dexter Lumis, Veer, Apollo Crews, and Vacant.

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