Been a lack of DOOM around this place – and when you’re talking about SQUASH of the Week, you need that! Especially since Ron Simmons and Butch Reed were great at clobbering geeks into oblivion.
I mean seriously, look at these two. You just see them and think ain’t no way I want to be on their bad side, yet that is precisely the situation William Bell and Bob Cook find themselves in today.
And you know, give Bell credit. He tries something different, that being a handshake. We’ve seen other doofuses attack from behind, so maybe, just maybe, a sign of friendship will make the beating less severe. Simmons ponders this, checking with Butch and even the crowd if he should reciprocate…before knocking Bell’s head off with a clothesline. HA!
He does however show compassion, by extending his hand to lift Bell off the mat…only to follow it up with another clothesline. He then starts punching Bell repeatedly, and when Bell has the temerity to throw a shot of his own, big Ron shows him how a proper haymaker is thrown.
Simmons then picks him up for a standing powerslam, and then gives him a beautiful legdrop. At this point Bell has got to be hoping that rain delay at the baseball game ends soon or there ain’t gonna be nothing left of him.
Butch no doubt is jealous of Ron having all the fun and tags in and now Bell is getting double teamed as well. Have to love Simmons leaving the ring by literally stepping on this jabroni. These guys were so great.
Butch hits a big ol’ clothesline and drops a trio of elbows. That gets a two, which likely would have been three if Reed didn’t pick him up off the canvas.
Hacksaw lands a body slam before heading to the second rope for a flying elbow. Once more the count is interrupted and Doom allows Cook to tag in to the fray.
That goes about as well as you’d expect, with Reed hoisting him up for Simmons to hit a flying shoulderblock. That does get the three count. However, that’s not enough of a workout for Simmons who decides to get a few pushups in on Cook’s doughy carcass! I’m sure you will agree with me when I tell you that this column needs more DOOM!