Frankie Lancaster

Frankie Lancaster

There comes a time where it’s easy to do a story about a storyline and insert a fit jobber or a jobber that had success later on down the road.

Today isn’t one of those days.

Instead, here’s the story of a perrenial jobber, Frankie “the Thumper” Lancaster.

Before you ask, no, I have no idea where he got the nickname of “the Thumper.” Now if Blade was writing this, he would make some gay porn joke. If RD was writing this, he would probably say that perhaps Frankie was the world’s only pro wrestler obsessed with Bambi. I’lll leave the lame jokes to them, and just say that I thought it was a pretty cool name, like something a Mafia hitman would have.

Whether it be from gay porn or a Disney fetish or the mob, his name didn’t really help in the squared circle, as he was never able to put together anything even close to a winning streak. However it should be known that he jobbed to people before they got their big break. Let’s start off in Florida where he wrestled none other than Scotty the Body.

Now you may be saying, “Scotty the WHAT? That name is worse than ‘Thumper’!” Apparently Scotty agreed, and would switch over to Scotty Flamingo in WCW, Johnny Polo in the WWF, and most importaintly, Raven. However, during his bout with our erstwhile jobber, it was Raven who would be the bird of prey as he tried to cheat in his victory, but was foiled by another JOTW in Mark Starr. Starr informed the referee that Scotty used the ropes for leverage. Unfortunately that just ended up for more punishment for both Starr and Lancaster, as they were pummeled by Raven…err…Scotty…err…Johnny. Eh, whatever.

After that, Lancaster ended up in Memphis to join up in some battle royal action, taking place in a bout in which the winner would receive $2,000.

One can only wonder what The Thumper would do with that kind of cash. Sadly, we’ll just keep on wondering as Frankie was tossed by Lord Humongous…who would go on to become Sid Vicious.

Now that would be a pretty good career – putting over a pre-Raven, and a young Sid Vicious. But the tale doesn’t end here. He would turn up at WCW in 1993 to fight even more promising young stars. Surely he could pick up a duke here, right?

A Rude Awakening says you’re wrong, as he was cannon fodder for the likes of Rick Rude…

And then chop suey for Yoshi Kwan (who we’ll discuss more in the future). Yes, despite being cheered in this encounter, Frankie wound up being put down by Yoshi’s nerve hold. Or as Jesse Venture would call it, the “Mr. Spock Nerve Hold”.

Now THAT sounds like a finisher!

You’d think after an interstellar beating like that, he’d be ready to hang up the tights. Instead, Frankie kept on fighting the good fight all the way up to 2000, when it looked like he finally might have found someone to beat in the form of The Maestro.

No such luck, as he wound soon be tapping out to the STF. When you are crying uncle to a demented orchestra conductor, it may be time to pack it up. And indeed, WCW made that decision for him, as Lancaster was cut (along with half the roster) due to budget constraints.

So they kept Evan Karagias and let The Thumper go?

No wonder that company went out of business!

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