WWF Raw – Novermber 9th, 1998 – Reunion Arena – Dallas, TX
WWF Raw kicks off with X-Pac, who last night on Sunday Night Heat was assaulted in the ring by The Undertaker in lieu of a match with Steven Regal. At Survivor Series, X-Pac actually will face the Real Man’s Man (who is still employed somehow after last week’s debacle). Tonight, however, he will take on Taker.
Undertaker pummels X-Pac in the opening seconds of the match until the lights go out. Kane then makes his long entrance bathed in red light. Undertaker, suspecting Kane might shoot fire out of his finger, puts X-Pac in the way. Sure enough, Kane shoots fire out of his finger, hitting X-Pac in the eye. Medics and the New Age Outlaws rush to the ring then arrive on the scene to tend to X-Pac.
Backstage, Vince McMahon tells Mankind he’s going to defend his new Hardcore title against Ken Shamrock tonight. This is the kind of thing Vince might have done a few weeks ago as punishment, but this week it’s a reward. He also hints at a makeover for his new surrogate son.
Val Venis is here with Terri Runnels trailing behind. Last night on Heat, Val revealed that Terri’s baby can’t possibly be his, as he had a vasectomy (Then again, so did Frank Sinatra, yet Ronan Farrow exists). Once Val notices Terri, he sends her away, then compares himself to Deion Sanders in that they both “score”. Not Val’s best work.
Venis takes on Steve Blackman, who soon takes the upper hand. Meanwhile, the announcers promise a feature on Jesse Ventura, whom the WWF ignored for the past eight years until last Tuesday’s election. How did the wheelchair-bound Vince McMahon manage to hop on that bandwagon?
After a minute or two, Venis takes control and gyrates over his prone opponent, at which point Terri makes her return. This time, though, she sneaks up behind Val and uppercuts him in the groin. Immediately, Owen Hart and the Blue Blazer hit the ring to attack Blackman. Supposedly, this rules out Owen as the Blazer (Terri, too). Because the two pieces of interference occurred within seconds, this match is presumably ruled a double disqualification.
Backstage, a clean-shaven Mankind gets a haircut, telling the hairdresser that there’s nothing wrong with a little trim. Indeed, it’s good to get a haircut.
The D-O-double-G (or single-G, as the chyron states) comes to the ring for a Triple Threat match with D’Lo Brown and Headbanger Mosh. This Sunday, the three men will team with their respective partners in a match with actual stakes (the tag team titles).
The heels team up against Road Dogg, choking him on the ring rope as referee Shane McMahon tries in vain to break up the hold. Mosh, however, double-crosses D’Lo and dumps him over the top rope. Luckily, this is not the Royal Rumble (because that match will suck). Road Dogg catches a break when both Mosh and D’Lo miss top rope moves, leading to a triple-down spot. The Dogg throws his signature punches on both men, then gets caught with the Sky High. D’Lo takes too long celebrating, however, and falls prey to Mosh’s Stage Dive for the 1-2-3. Post-match, Billy Gunn cleans house, so the Outlaws’ theme plays.
Backstage, Jeff Jarrett kicks Michael Cole out of the interview and tells the audience what pisses him off. The answer: Al Snow. But tonight, Debra McMichael (possibly suffering laryngitis) promises to prove Goldust is “100% man”. Will she follow through on her veiled and sexy threat?
WWF Raw returns with Mankind, mid-pedicure, mourning the loss of Mr. Socko but acknowledging his new family: Mr. McMahon, the stooges, etc.
Terri Runnels is back in her Marlena outfit to ingratiate herself to Goldust. Once again, the former Dustin Runnels is having none of it. Contradicting his typical verbiage, he advises Terri to forget the name of Goldust.
Tonight’s WWF Raw is brought to you by Western Union, Castrol Syntec, and the new Stone Cold Metal CD.
Goldust dominates his opponent Jeff Jarrett before being distracted by Debra (now officially classified as a Jezebel). The diversion allows Jarrett to land a punch on Goldust for a brief comeback, but the Bizarre One bounces back. Before Goldust can shatter Jeff’s dreams, Debra steps in to flirt with him; Jarrett cuts the makeout session short with a guitar shot, drawing a disqualification.
The announcers talk over top of old footage of Jesse Ventura, whom Vince McMahon has invited to next week’s WWF Raw. Jerry Lawler, meanwhile, denies rumors that he’s running for political office, despite a local political cartoon.
The JVC Kaboom of the Week is Ken Shamrock’s chair shot to The Rock on last week’s WWF Raw.
Backstage with Michael Cole, The Rock calls Vince McMahon a roody poo but stumbles through some of his other insults. Immediately after the promo, Goldust chases after Jeff Jarrett, beating him with the guard rail until the Blue Blazer intervenes. The masked hero runs away after his good deed, at which point the two men resume their brawl.
A commercial airs for USA Network’s Pacific Blue. On this next episode, a character’s new girlfriend turns out to be a hooker. I don’t understand why they get to use the phrase, “$200 ho” when Sunday Night Heat (airing just one hour earlier) has to call the Godfather’s escorts, “friends”.
Hardcore champion Mankind now faces Intercontinental champion Ken Shamrock. Mankind, whose title is the only one on the line in this match, shows up in a tuxedo, hair slicked back under his match. Piped-in boos then signal the arrival of Vince McMahon on the WWF Raw stage.
The Hardcore title gets off to an auspicious start when Mankind hits Shamrock with his loafer. Ken later makes the first pin attempt in Hardcore title history, an inside cradle on the floor. He then hits him with the timekeeper’s tiny hammer and the Hardcore belt, which is barely held together with tape. Along the way, Mankind loses his other shoe.
Back in the ring, Shamrock back body-drops Mankind “kidneys first” (if that is possible) onto a steel chair. Shamrock also ends up dropping Mankind face first on the ring steps but takes too long to capitalize, getting mule kicked in the groin. Mankind then chases Ken up the ramp, one swing of the chair at a time.
Shamrock appears to have the match won with an unprotected chairshot to Mankind’s head… that is, until the Bossman hits him with his nightstick, allowing Mankind to drape an arm over him for the victory. Afterwards, Mankind hugs McMahon, who wipes the accompanying sweat off his face in disgust when Mankind’s back is turned.
Before WWF Raw goes to commercial, medics rush into The Rock’s dressing room. After the break, we learn that he was attacked by an unseen assailant.
In the ring, Steve Austin threatens Vince McMahon if he tries to screw him over at Survivor Series. The Big Bossman interrupts him to inform Austin that he’s going to kick his ass. Stone Cold then implies that Bossman used to r*pe prisoners, but that Austin will do the same thing to him with a nightstick.
Backstage after the break, Vince McMahon takes exception to Michael Cole’s claim that The Rock would be fired if he didn’t beat Mark Henry tonight. No, says Mr. McMahon, he would simply be unemployed. Thanks for the clarification, Vince. Either way, it spells trouble for The Rock, who is going to be taken away in an ambulance.
Tiger Ali Singh comes to the ring to wrestle Al Snow in a rematch from One Night Only 1997. But Singh refuses to wrestle the likes of Snow, whose mannequin head wears Mr. Socko as a head band. Therefore, Snow has to wrestle Tiger’s unwilling manservant Babu. Debra strolls down to the ring to clutch Head to “her bosom” (in Ross’ words), which distracts Snow. With Snow’s back turned, Tiger Ali Singh sneaks up from behind and bulldogs Al for the 1-2-3 (in a match he wasn’t even in).
A training montage airs of Sable working out in low-cut gear. She faces Jacqueline for the prestigious Women’s Championship this Sunday.
In the locker room, Vince McMahon and the Bossman taunt The Rock.
Edge, who with Gangrel and Christian lives a “very bizarre, mysterious, Gothic lifestyle”, faces Kane. Tonight, the Big Red Machine looks to counter Edge’s numbers advantage with a gas can and blowtorch. As expected, Kane controls the entire match, no-selling what little offense Edge manages. Finally, Edge dives over the top rope onto the floor and flattens Kane, at which point the other tow Brood members put the boots to the big man.
Kane wins by disqualification, then destroys The Brood once again. This week has the added element of immolation, as Kane piles up all three men, plus the referee, and douses them in gasoline. Hehehe… now it looks like Jimmy Korderas wet his pants. Right before Kane can use his blowtorch, other referees stop him from setting the men on fire. The fans boo. On Kane’s way out, he chokeslams a fan with really stupid hair.
WWF Raw returns with only one match remaining. Confident that The Rock won’t show up, Mr. McMahon rolls down to ringside and calls him to the ring. He also taunts the Dallas Cowboys just for fun. Shane McMahon then comes down to psychoanalyze his dad. In the process, Vince all but admits to beating his son. But tonight, it’s the Bossman who will do the honors before Steve Austin runs in to make the save.
Thirteen minutes remain in WWF Raw, meaning—spoiler alert—the main event will actually take place. With Mark Henry in the ring, The Rock’s music hits… twice. The second time, The Rock really does show up, wearing the warm-up suit he’ll soon adopt as his main wrestling gear. This is called planning ahead—Rock will soon get the fat sucked out of his pecs, so he needs to get fans used to the shirt he’ll wear during recovery.
The World’s Strongest Man has the injured Rock largely under control, though The Rock does manage to suplex the big man. The Rock rallies with clotheslines and, with the referee’s back turned, a low blow, at which point the Bossman tries to handcuff the People’s Champ. Instead, Bossman himself ends up cuffed to the turnbuckle.
The Rock fells Mark Henry with a DDT, but D’Lo Brown pulls the referee out of the ring. Rocky dispenses with Brown, then hits the Rock Bottom/People’s Elbow combo on Mark Henry. With no referee available, Shane McMahon rushes down to the ring and makes the count, granting The Rock the match, extended employment, and a spot in the Deadly Game tournament.
After the match, The Rock throws Vince into the ring and gets rid of the stooges. McMahon feigns a handshake to The Rock, but instead slaps him in the face. So enraged that his eyes nearly pop out of their sockets, The Rock gives the boss the Rock Bottom and the People’s Elbow, all while Bossman has to watch.