INDUCTION: Starrcade Main Eventer Ed Leslie – The Granddaddy of Them All Gets Butchered

53 Submitted by on Thu, 29 June 2017, 20:00

WCW, 1994

I like how everyone and their brother is complaining about Jinder Mahal ramdomly being thrust into the main event scene. I mean, sure, I’ve brought it up too, viewing this as one of the ultimate troll jobs Vince McMahon has ever perpetrated, just to get all of us hardcores in a tizzy. Look, I’ve heard all the reason for the Mahal title reign, how WWE is hot to make major inroads into India, all that stuff.  So there is a business reason behind it.

Compare and contrast that to our induction today, in which another guy who was basically a jobber at the time was put into the main event of WCW’s biggest annual event. After all these years I’ve finally mustered the courage to spend the time and go back to take a look at the time Starrcade, the legendary granddaddy of them all, was main evented by none other than Ed Leslie.

For the uninitiated, I would be referring to this gentleman:

You know him, I’m sure.  Brutus Beefcake aka The Barber aka the Zodiac aka the Man with No Name aka Dizzy Hogan aka The Booty Man aka The Disciple aka…

…the man who wore this ridiculous mask and helped to ruin the WWF’s biggest show of the year back in 1993.

But hey, why stop there?  Especially when you are one of Hulk Hogan’s best friends, and thus, therefore, three dots in the form of a triangle gifted main event spots just by being in his posse?

So yes, the year after Wrestlemania IX in which Hogan and Beefcake stunk up the joint in a tag match, the two would once more reunite, this time in WCW, this time as foes.  At the time, Hogan was in the midst of attempting to put Ric Flair away once and for all, leading up to a retirement match between the two at Halloween Havoc.  You had to kinda think the Nature Boy would want to get out of dodge, as at every single turn Hogan made him look like a total chump, never allowing him to get an upper hand.

Hogan did that with pretty much everyone.  No wonder people wound up hating him during this run.

In the build to the match, Hogan would randomly be attacked by a mysterious masked assailant, who everyone in the world knew was Arn Anderson.  He moved like Arn, he walked like Arn, he attacked like Arn.  All this made sense – he was Flair’s buddy after all.

So imagine the shock and dismay when he was finally unmasked and revealed to be Hogan’s lifelong buddy, Brother Bruti.  Bobby Heenan stated that Brutus had “butchered a friendship”, and thus the name stuck.  In the span of about 3 minutes, we were beaten over the head that Brother Bruti was dead – and here comes the Butcher!

Seriously – they were going to main event the legendary Starrcade with Brutus Beefcake!

What on earth were they thinking?

Yeah, I don’t know either dude.

And hey, you were in WCW once upon a time – why didn’t you ever have a WCW guitar?

The question remained – could this match live up to past Starrcade main events such as Flair vs. Race?

SPOILER ALERT: No.

To show that he was in fact a horrible, despicable man that everyone should hate, he took Hulk’s shirt and tore it.

Wait, didn’t Hogan do that in every single one of his matches as the people cheered?

I am so confused.

The Hulkster comes to the ring, and I will be totally honest – the crowd is very rabid for the guy.  I mean, these geeks painted their torsos for him even though they appear to be totally constipated and thus had far larger issues.  That’s dedication to their fandom.

Ditto this kid, who has a foam hand/ear combo.  At least I think that’s what it is.  I could be a hand holding picture of a deformed fetus of some sort.  Maybe like the child of Squidward.

What, you have a better idea of what the heck that’s supposed to be?  $10 PayPal to the best response in the comments section below.

And let’s not forget the guys who printed out HULK RULES on their DOT MATRIX PRINTER ON MULTIPLE FANFOLD PAGES.  I seriously wanted to save the file above as a .BMP instead of .JPG just to honor them.

Finally, we get these two skanks who absolutely, positively had to have been related to someone on the WCW crew.  Or banging someone on the WCW crew.  I’m guessing the latter, and my money is on Eric Bischoff.

Hopefully someone asks him about them the next time he’s on a podcast.

Michael Buffer gives us the introductions, explaining that this has been, and I am quoting here, “a glorious evening of WCW professional wrestling.”  This card that featured such show stoppers as Kevin Sullivan versus Mr. T, I might add.  His definition of that word and mine are apparently very different.

Anyway, he screws things up but not to any great degree as he often did.  I mean, sure he tells us that The Butcher grew up in Venice Beach with Hogan (news to me, he was always billed from San Francisco) and that Hogan is the king of “HULK-MANIA” (think you forgot a vowel there buddy), but this is pretty low key botchery  by his standards at the time.

After playing Hogan’s theme once more (no idea why, maybe the sound guy just really liked it), the two go to work on each other with chops and shoulder blocks.  Within seconds, the “action” spills outside the ring, with Beefer stealing Hogan’s favorite move, the BACK RAKE.  Unlike the Hulkster, Brutus apparently thought it was a legit attack – look at Hogan’s poor back!  Jeez kid, this isn’t a shoot!

Oh wait, sorry, that’s just Hogan’s post ‘roids physique playing tricks on my eyes.  His back is just kinda flabby now.  Sorry about that.

Brutus grabs a microphone cord and attempts to strangle Hogan.  Tony goes into detail about how this is the cord is actually for Gary Capetta’s microphone, which prompts Bobby Heenan to quip, “Of course it is, it isn’t his umbilical cord!!”

I know a lot of folks (myself included) thought that WCW Bobby wasn’t quite as great as he was in the WWF, but him saying that and following it up with telling us how watching this was just like Andy attacking Aunt Bee is strong evidence we may need to reconsider such a stance.

Back in the ring, Butcher drops to his knees in front of the Hulkacrotch.  Hogan ponders giving him a punch, but instead also falls to the mat and gives him a big ol’ smooch.

Ewwwwwwwwwww!!!!!

Oh, he’s BITING him, not kissing him.

Not sure which is worse, honestly.

Butcher gets the heat by choking the Hulkster and then gently massaging his shoulders with what is allegedly a nerve hold.  Schiavone tells us that this is a good strategy as Brutus’ finisher is the sleeper.  Gotta give Tony credit here for at least trying to bring some kind of drama to this dreadfully boring match.

As Tony predicted, we get the sleeper.

As everyone on planet earth would also predict, Hogan’s arm drops twice but not three times and he begins Hulking up.  Anyone want to guess how this ends?

Yep, leg drop and the 1-2-3.

The only difference between this and the normal formula is that here Hogan stopped before doing so to beat up Avalanche (our buddy Earthquake John Tenta) and Kevin Sullivan.  Eh, they should have just made it a three-on-one handicap match if they were going to do that.

After the match, Randy Savage comes out to save Butcher and Co. from further beatings, eventually shaking Hogan’s hand in the process in a very non-Megapowers handshake kinda way.  Poor WCW, they couldn’t even do a handshake right.

Moving on from this, Hogan would enter into a hot feud with Vader.  Note I say “enter”, because in their first encounter, Vader power bombed him and he immediately no sold it to kill that poor guy off.

Next, Hogan teamed with Savage.  Believe it or not, Hogan actually was beaten down pretty good in the match, so Savage dropped an elbow on him to revive him.  You know, because he always no sold Savage’s finisher too!

Ahh, WCW.  You’ve been dead of 16 years, yet I’m still not even close to strip mining all the WrestleCrap you brought to the world!

Written by

Yeah, you know...the WrestleCrap guy. Been here since before day 1, I have. You can hang out with me on Facebook. (I'm on there quite a bit) or follow my exploits on Twitter (I'm on there not quite so often). Thanks, and Keep on Crappin'!
53 Responses to "INDUCTION: Starrcade Main Eventer Ed Leslie – The Granddaddy of Them All Gets Butchered"
  1. Alexander Arce says:

    I think the printout would say Hulk Rules (at turning WCW 1994 into the WWF 1987-88).

  2. Daniel says:

    That foam thingy looks like Donald Trump’s grabbing himself some you know what…

  3. MisterSpiffy says:

    that my friends is the ear from that old wwe popcorn set that was features on a Sombody Bought this a long time ago

  4. kmtown says:

    “I knew it was you, brother. You broke my heart. You broke my heart.”

  5. The Doctor of Style says:

    “I’m back, honey. What did you do tonight?”

    “I had a glorious evening of WCW wrestling.”

  6. Art0Donnell says:

    Don’t forget that Hogan’s arm actually did drop a third time, at which point Ed immediately released the hold and celebrated. The referee didn’t ring the bell though, and as soon as Ed turned his back, Hogan put his arm up, so the match continued for some reason. Hulk shushed the crowd so he could play possum and surprise Ed.

  7. Hulk6785 says:

    So, instead of waiting to end the Hogan/Flair feud at Starrcade, they gave us this. Fucking, WCW.

  8. "The Big Cheese" Paul Kraft says:

    Yes1 Finally this is inducted! 🙂 Nicely done, R.D! Maxx Payne never got a WCW guitar because Van Hammer had it in his contract that only he could play guitar in WCW.

  9. Unknown says:

    Don’t forget about the Hogan/Vader strap match at Uncensored 1995, featuring run-ins by two masked men, a crazed-looking Ric Flair, the debut of the Renegade, and Hogan winning the match by dragging FLAIR to all four corners (please don’t ask). Hell, it wouldn’t be too much to induct the entire card, featuring a Dustin Rhodes King of the Road match, Ric Flair cross-dressing, a foodfight between Harlem Heat and the Nasty Boys, and other…events…

    • The Doctor of Style says:

      Sounds like a good idea, and actually the King of the Road match was an early induction. I have this vague idea that the four corners match was already inducted, too, but maybe that’s just ’cause it *sounds* so bad, I figure the site must’ve covered it at some point!

  10. Justin Henry says:

    All told, “skank” on the left was aight.

  11. Joey says:

    I have no idea what that is, but Arnold Schwarzenegger has been trying his hardest to convince me that it’s not a tumor.

  12. Sean Bateman says:

    oh great Mr. T in WCW! INDUCT IT NOW!!!

  13. Hulk Hogan’s Thermos says:

    Tell Agent P to lift my forum ban!

  14. Larry says:

    The foam ear looks like the silhouette head of Baron Von Raschke, (with mustache), telling the boy, “This match is going to suck kid.”

  15. Guest says:

    Those two women (that were needlessly referred to as skanks) were fine looking.

    Also why is Brutus dressed to look like Mongo?

  16. Thun says:

    That foam looks like a hand holding the map of Sweden.

    As drawn by Brooke Hogan.

  17. John C says:

    I thought they meant it would be Hogan vs Abdullah when I heard the butcher name mentioned. Quite a letdown, you Mr. Leslie are indeed no butcher, not even Sam the Butcher. From Race-Flair to Flair-Dusty to Flair-Vader then Hulk Hogan vs Brutus The F’n Barber Beefcake in a Starrcade main event.

    The ear thingy reminded of a Strikeforce MMA show on CBS in 2008 between Kimbo Slice and James Thompson. Mr Thompson had a huge cauliflower ear which exploded in bloody delight on tv when Mr. Slice hit it. Look it up on the google machine it’s quite gory-ious.

  18. Zee says:

    So the foam ears actually had technology in them that would pick up any whispers from people who said Hogan was not the greatest of all time or any wrestler trying to conspire against him. After hearing it Hogan would place the sounds through a converter that turned everything into Hulk Rules for Eric Bischoff to hear.

  19. Scoot says:

    Anyone else think that the skank on the right looks like Ricky Morton in drag?

    • Brother Bruti says:

      I did.

      Wasn’t the beginning of this angle the Hulkster getting the Nancy Kerrigan treatment only to walk back to the arena from the hospital in time for the title match?

  20. Roland Smitts says:

    I remember being disappointed Hogan & Ed didn’t break out that spot where they start strutting simultaneously (Hogan mocking Beefcake’s strut) they used to do when they fought in the WWF. That would have (barely) saved it from being WrestleCrap.

  21. Andrew Weaver says:

    “You idiot! These Reservoir Dogs foam hands should be white, not yellow! What are we going to do with them now?”

    “It’s okay sir, I have an idea. Someone get me Hulk Hogan’s phone number!”

  22. The Barber says:

    They should have given that foam finger to Cactus Jack. Or Vader.

    My guess is the foam finger is a piece of promotional material for the newest Super Smash Brothers game featuring Master Hand holding Giygas.

  23. The Gold Standard says:

    The foam thing held by the kid…..

    That looks like a pre-Bubba the love sponge dinner for Hogan. Hogan is holding some oysters while he gets his 50+ year old steroid addled body ready to put it to Mrs. Clam….I mean Clem.

  24. The Barber says:

    My guess is the foam finger is a piece of Super Smash Brothers merchandise featuring Master Hand and Giygas.

    Or, if WCW was smart, should have given that piece of merchandise to Vader for his feud with Cactus Jack.

  25. Ricky says:

    It looks like the kid is showing off his 10oz T-Bone steak with a hand that was bitten by a spider

  26. RobVanDamIsABallerina says:

    That is obviously a foam geoduct eating hot dogs.

  27. jermaphobe says:

    When asked about the size of his ear in the foam depiction, Hogan responded:

    “Well, it’s not mine, because mine isn’t that size. But we were discussing the length of Hulk Hogan’s. No, seriously, I do not have a ten-inch ear, no, I do not, seriously. Believe that, seriously. Yeah, because Terry Bollea’s ear is not ten inches like you’re trying to say.”

  28. Deepthroat Ghoul says:

    According to OSW Review, the original planned main event for this PPV was going to be Hogan vs. Flair one last time, then it got changed to Hogan vs. Sting, and was then changed again to Hogan vs. Vader, which was the way it was going until Hogan abruptly changed his mind about it and suggested his friend The Butcher as his Starrcade opponent.

    However, as we all know, Hogan still agreed to work with Vader in 1995 after this PPV.

  29. Evan Waters says:

    I have heard that there were a lot of times that Starrcade wasn’t really treated as the biggest show of the year anyway- that often Great American Bash would be a much bigger deal. In 1995, for example, Starrcade was mostly centered around a bunch of US vs Japan matches, Hogan was off on vacation, it was a low key affair.

    Ed Leslie’s a bit of a sad case. He wasn’t a great wrestler, but after the parasailing accident he was really in no condition to actually wrestle- his back was pretty well done for, so he couldn’t take a lot of back bumps, and his face was pretty fragile so you had to watch out for that too. So every match he’s in afterwards is like 90% showboating and taunting.

  30. C. Peter Roberts says:

    I could tell you what that kid is holding, but that would be SPOILERS for an upcoming episode of the new Twin Peaks.

  31. Preservative Lad says:

    The foam thing?

    It’s a Bizarro Calzone.

    Which is one of the few names Ed Leslie didn’t wrestle under.

  32. Jim says:

    Deal! You missed the funniest part of this match. While Butcher is coming out Schiavone stumbles over the phrase “they’ve stacked the deck against Hogan” and clearly says “they stacked the dick against Hogan”.

  33. Retro Redress says:

    I just figured the big yellow hand was a relative of Mark Henry, enjoying some downtime by cheering the Hulkster on.

    Not sure about the ear though – maybe that was the hand’s plus one?

  34. Tempest Fennac says:

    What was the actual storyline reason for Ed turning on Hogan anyway? As the induction stated, Anderson would have made perfect sense here but I don’t see why Bruti would attack Hogan.

  35. Brandon says:

    This entire show should have been inducted. Only good match was Vader and Duggan for the US title. The rest of the card stunk with Triple H jobbing to Alex Wright, a Nasty Boys match, Kevin Sullivan vs. Mr. T, and Sting vs. Avalanche was nothing special either.

  36. Fred says:

    The kid is wearing a large yellow glove because he suffers from a case of having a giant hand, which in a way is good cause he’s holding up that yellow and red growth on the side of his head.

  37. Anthony says:

    I remember as a 12 year old mark being afraid that Hogan was going to lose the title and was glad he retained. Imagine if Brutus Beefcake can say he was a former wcw champion? Wouldn’t be as bad as Arquette or Russo, but still…

  38. Matt says:

    I love it when my two favorite wrestling things, this and OSW, coincide.

  39. Shawn says:

    The foam hand is for sale at nearly every gallery during a Van Gogh exhibit.

  40. Kevin says:

    The foam toy that youngster is holding is what was inside Hogan’s “War Bonnet” from 1988.

  41. 80's Guy says:

    Why, the foam hand is obviously holding the bloody miscarriage that was Beefcake’s WCW career…..

  42. Mister Forth says:

    That finger and ear looks like Hogan with Mrs. The Love Sponge.

  43. CP says:

    The foam hand looks like the rack of ribs hooked to Fred Flintstones roof with a nasty boil on it.

  44. Jason Hawkins says:

    The true nature of that “foam finger” is as disgusting as it is troubling.

    Disgusting, as any true crapper will recognize that foam object as a commerative foam plaque announcing the birth of Mark Henry and Mae Young’s lovechild (complete with a close up of the moment of birth!).

    Troubling, as that glorious moment wouldn’t occur for years. That child is obviously a time traveler. Time travel alone, and the paradoxes associated with it should be terrifying enough, but consider this: how horrible is the future in which parents sell their children into time-slavery to serve as plants at WCW PPVs?

leave a comment