Induction: Cryme Tyme meets George W. Bush: If the President was pro-life, why did he perform this comedic abortion?

31 Submitted by on Thu, 13 March 2014, 20:00

WWE, 2006

WWE, not unlike the Ultimate Warrior, has a lot of bad habits, but only ones that help this website survive. Besides a fascination with feces, outrageously lewd sexual story lines, and constantly humiliating Jim Ross, Vince and his band of merry yes-men have always had a thing for political jokes.

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Well, not so much “political” jokes as jokes about politicians; making fun of Bill Clinton’s womanizing, for instance, is pretty uncontroversial and won’t actually challenge anyone’s political beliefs. In other words, nothing that can’t pass the Jay Leno test. And they’re not so much “jokes,” either, so much as trotting out an impersonator or three and having them do goofy stunts.

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We all remember, unfortunately, the Hillary-Bill-Obama fiasco of 2008.

The McMahons being Republicans, most of the “fun” is had at the expense of the other guys. Oh, and there might be the odd pro-war propaganda segment or two thrown in there when the opinion polls support it.

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But one notable exception to the right-wing stance was in December 2006, when WWE took some cheap shots at the (by then) highly unpopular President George W. Bush. Mind you, this was after the final mid-term elections of Bush’s tenure had already come and gone, so it was safe to trash the Commander in Chief without affecting his or his party’s election chances. gwb04
gwb05 On that night in the nation’s capital, Cryme Tyme introduced “George W. Bush,” an obvious stand-in for the real president. What was the occasion? Kanye West’s recent comment that George Bush didn’t care about black people. That remark was made at a TV fundraiser for Hurricane Katrina relief, which, you’ll recall, happened over a year earlier. So yes, on a geological time scale, that comment was recent, like the end of the last Ice Age.
WWE has since improved the timeliness of their responses to Kanye West controversies. Why, in 2009, Dave Batista parodied West’s interruption of Taylor Swift’s acceptance speech a mere three months after the original incident had been run into the ground on the internet. gwb06
gwb07 Speaking of delayed responses, while Kanye’s accusations were about Bush’s delayed response to the Hurricane Katrina disaster, someone on the Raw writing team simply heard “George Bush” and “black people” and decided to run wild with it. See, said the fake Bush, he did like black people.
People like Colin Powell, one of his “homies,” and people like Condoleeza Rice, whom he called, “one hot little black bitch.” Classic Dubya! When you think of the all-time horn-dogs who have ever sat in the Oval Office, and you forget about Clinton and JFK and maybe a dozen or two other moderately sex-crazed presidents, George W. Bush would top the list. gwb08
gwb09 But Fake Bush wasn’t finished. Why, another black person he was “down with” was George Jefferson, author of the Declaration of Independence. Hehehe! That was Thomas Jefferson. George Jefferson was a fictional sit-com character from 70s television. Silly goose! What would our wacky President say next?
Answer: the N-word. gwb10
gwb11 Now, granted, he was using it in a friendly context, but even that is enough to get you suspended if you’re Michael Hayes or Vince McMahon. Well, not Vince McMahon, but Cryme Tyme still cut the President off just before he could make the kind of faux-pas that only a poorly-focused parody of Bush, Jr. could commit.
“Bush” apologized for misquoting himself. See? Aside from the strange racist overtones, WWE was partying like it was 1999! Or, more accurately, 2000. I bet if the Bush impersonator had thrown strategery in there, the audience would have just lapped it up. gwb12
gwb13 The Chief Executive then said that if Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin, who were feuding with Cryme Tyme, were the World’s Greatest Tag Team, then he was the World’s Greatest President. Actually, he said, “The Greatest Tag Team in the World,” but I’ve rephrased it because Haas and Benjamin didn’t actually call themselves that. So add “lack of product knowledge” to Fake Bush’s Wrestlecrap résumé.
As “Hail to the Chief” brought this segment to a merciful end, Shad Gaspard stole the President’s wallet as Secret Service stood by and did nothing. gwb14
gwb15 Then, Cryme Tyme’s own theme music played as Bush started getting his dance on
…or whatever middle-aged white characters used to say ironically for laughs. gwb16
gwb17 Having the president dance was such a cheap way to get laughs that WWE would do it again in 2011. It’s such an uncreative gag; get any president in history to cut a rug, and at least some idiots are bound to laugh. Just be glad WWE wasn’t around during FDR’s day.
And just when you thought the most inane Dubya impersonation this side of Dana Carvey in Master of Disguise was over… gwb18
gwb19 …Fake Bush realized he’d been pick-pocketed and demanded that someone “arrest those nigg— arrest those people!” Jerry Lawler pretended to think this was a riot, but everyone else in the audience just sat in shock, collectively gasping as the offending line was delivered. I would be shocked, too, if I found out the leader of my country was a flaming racist.
There was only one way to save this segment: cue Hail to Chief, have J.R. rationalize the debacle by implying that it wasn’t really the President, and have the King chuckle some more about that “misquote myself” line. gwb20
gwb21 Finally, “George Bush” delivered not a double “V for victory,” but a double middle finger. 
And just to further prove that the writers weren’t exactly sure of whom they were parodying, that was Richard Nixon’s trademark pose, not Bush’s. gwb22
gwb23 Although I guess the middle fingers were authentic.

And if you thought this poorly-received stunt would have dissuaded WWE from wasting air time with bad impersonations…

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…Donald vs. Rosie would be booked just three weeks later.

 

Written by

A wrestling fan ever since the days of Wrestlemania IX, Art graduated from college in the same building where Art Donovan called King of the Ring 1994. He currently runs the "How Much Does This Guy Weigh?" blog, where he reviews New Generation-Era Monday Night Raws and Hasbro WWF figures. Email at: art@wrestlecrap.com
31 Responses to "Induction: Cryme Tyme meets George W. Bush: If the President was pro-life, why did he perform this comedic abortion?"
  1. Jerichoholic Ninja says:

    Has the Donald vs. Rosie “match” been inducted? I remember that enraging me more than just about anything. Talented wrestlers were barely on Raw, but for some reason the WWE thought a Rosie O’Donnell impersonator having an orgasm while eating a fudgie the whale cake would be good television.

  2. Raven7309 says:

    Seeing as how Donald Trump was inducted into the “Celebrity Wing” of the WWE HOF last year, (and by Vinnie Mac no less!!), I say all of the various celebrity impersonators get inducted this year. Who’s with me? :-D

  3. ChrisV says:

    Not only that, but the “match” was given about 20 minutes. I don’t have any official numbers, but I’m guessing the main event that night last half the time.
    I’m pretty sure it was inducted though, yeah.

    • M says:

      IIRC, the main event was John Cena vs The Great Khali in a precursor to Khali’s mega-push later that year.

      • Nobby says:

        If that’s the case, it did indeed only last half the time since Cena/Khali part one (mercifully) only lasted about 8-9 minutes and thanks to an expert carry job by Cena was far better than it had any right to be.

    • Nick Nutter says:

      This was also a week after Cena lost to Kevin Federline while in the middle of his 13-month title reign.

  4. Andre R. says:

    I honestly thought Cryme Tyme *themselves* would have been inducted by now. You know, for being a blantantly racist and offensive stereotype of urban black males. Am I missing something?

    • Nobby says:

      Yes. Primarily the fact that they were popular. Also, if they were happy to do it, and they actually resonated with the audience, then who are you to call it offensive? Offence is not an absolute.

      • Andre R. says:

        Well, Vinny Mac is notorious for having his workers parade around and perpetuate crude ethnic (and sometimes racist) stereotypes. And these two seemed to be a part of it. That’s all I’m saying.

      • Erich says:

        2 words – Saba Simba

  5. Scrooge McSuck says:

    This shit really made it past the “bullshitting stupid ideas for dumb laughs that would never make it to TV” part of the creative process? I’m glad I stopped watching at this point. I was anti-Bush, but this intelligence insulting bad.

  6. Sir Thomas says:

    Wow, I actually don’t remember this happening at all. I get the feeling I dodged a bullet there.

  7. The Doctor of Style says:

    Good job, Art. This event was Grade A Wrestlecrap. But bringing up “Master of Disguise” at the same time was too deadly a cocktail of awfulness. I think smoke came out of my monitor.

    I like how someone’s pointing at Shad Gaspard stealing the wallet, just in case the slow kids at home didn’t notice.

  8. Mike Hunt says:

    The panic and bewilderment on Mike Myers face was classic during Kanye’s nonsense.

  9. The Scanian Maniac says:

    At least better than Hornswaggle’s childish antics accompanied by Michael Cole’s constantly fake laughter as a way to insist that Hornswaggle is so damn funny, that we got with the PG rating in 2008.

  10. WC Fan says:

    I’ve never seen this before. Wow, was this bad. Also, Chris Tucker’s reaction to what Kanye West said was priceless because he literally had no clue how he was suppose to follow that.

  11. Nobby says:

    I didn’t find anything ‘offensive’ about the race jokes. They’re playing on the idea that Bush himself was totally out of touch with any culture and social groups outside of his own incredibly insular and small set of privileged republicans. And, if they HAD to do the tiresome “white guy says the n word” joke that’s been run into the ground, I actually found the part where Bush almost slipped up again and showed his true colours to be pretty funny.

    The truly offensive thing about this angle was that it took up (i.e. wasted) ample amounts of time during a wrestling show and was just a weak parody of something that happened once. So really, what was most offensive was that WWE thought they could keep audiences amused with this rubbish.

  12. Jimbolian says:

    Thanks for this induction. I always knew Vince took jabs at the Clintons and Obama before, but couldn’t quite remember doing it for Gee-Dubya since the McMahons are “Republicans” until now.

    • The Scanian Maniac says:

      I always thought the jabs were tounge in cheek and never offensive?

      Wouldn’t Ron Paul and McCaine be happy to be parodied on Raw and get the exposure in the primaries, like Hillary and Obama got?

    • Anonymous says:

      The McMahons are snakes. They’re whatever it benefits them to be at any moment. They’ll make fun of whoever or whatever they please regardless of whether or not the audience wants any part of it (which of course they never have and never will.

      • Guest says:

        And yet the audience you’re generalizing are the same people who have no problem making fun of or getting cheap laughs at the expense of certain talent like chanting you got bitch slapped at Randy Orton during his match against Kurt Angle on ECW or whenever Vickie Guerrero gets put on blast usually because of her weight or her appearance.

  13. Anonymous says:

    This seriously may have been the low point in the history of RAW

  14. Anonymous says:

    This seriously may have been the low point in the history of RAW. Was 2006-2007 the worst two year period in the history or WWE?

  15. Anonymous says:

    “Exception speech”? You mean ACCEPTANCE speech?

  16. BeaverCleavage says:

    Hey, at least this was more timely than an Occupy Movement reference 2 1/2 years after it happened….

  17. Mr Maddog says:

    Please remember this the next time WWE does another MLK tribute…

  18. Ted Arcidi says:

    Yeah this was not a good time for the WWE. Crack up every time I read some 15-year old kid who says last weeks Raw (or any in the last year) was the worst show ever.
    Nope go watch some of those shows during those couple years. Truly awful in every way possible. It wasn’t even DVR-worthy.

  19. FFS says:

    Absolutely nothing can convince me that Vince and Co. are not either flat-out, 100% racist or flat-out, 100% ignorant. Likely it’s both. One could say, “Well, he hires [insert race, ethnicity, gender],” but it seems like more often than not it’s just to exploit them as living, breathing stereotypes (and to get fans from those “groups” to watch/spend their money). I guess he knows his audience – but then again, many wrestling fans have progressed over the years. Except where it comes to women in wrestling. I think respect may have actually gone farther down for them. The people from those “groups” are likewise morons for being made into caricatures for the sake of $$$.

    And the stuff that WWE still thinks is funny – unfunny parodies that wrestle, sing, and/or dance, and big men wrestlers forced to sing and/or dance – stopped being a one-off source of humor decades ago.

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