The Patriots

The Patriots

In the grand scheme of things, former WCW US Tag Team Champions The Patriots are minor offenders in the world of bad gimmicks. Yeah, they had goofy personas – Todd Champion was, apparently, a military type of some sort, and his partner was decked out in firefighter gear and dubbed “Firebreaker Chip.” Ok, so maybe it was pretty lame, but that’s not what landed them in the stinking pile that is Wrestlecrap.

It was their “hometown”.

Now we all know most hometowns are fictional. Whether it be “Parts Unknown”, “Every Woman’s Fantasy”, or “The Last House on the Left”, most wrestlers aren’t really “from” where they are announced.

But the Patriots had a special hometown. Here’s Gary Michael Capetta to tell you more.

Go ahead, listen to it. It takes like 2 seconds to download.

Got it?

Yep, they were from “WCW Special Forces.” Now I don’t know exactly why that strikes me as so funny, but it always has and always will. The next time somewhere asks you where you are from, reply, “WCW Special Forces.” Or if someone asks you your name, tell them it’s “Firebreaker Chip.”

They won’t get it, but you will. And I bet you’ll laugh.

Or at least the Wrestlecrap staff will, knowing that you did something as stupid as WCW would do.

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