Rhythm And Blues

Rhythm And Blues

A lot of people are curious as to why certain wrestlers with terrible gimmicks are not yet WrestleCrappers. There’s a very good reason for this: I only want to “honor” those gimmicks that were terrible and an embarrassment to wrestling. While some would consider Doink the Clown a black eye, I wouldn’t – the original concept was very sound, and Matt Borne, working as a vicious heel, made the character work. It was when Dink came along that the gimmick failed.

Same thing goes for good ol’ Wayne Ferris, aka The Honky Tonk Man. The idea of an Elvis impersonating wrestler is really bad, but Ferris, who infuriated fans with his “Thank you for your support, you’re a beautiful audience” speeches made the character awesome.

But then the character’s heat started to die out, and Vince McMahon decided to tag him up with an over the hill Greg “The Hammer” Valentine and form Rhythm & Blues.

Valentine dyed his blonde hair jet black, and started to wear Elvis outfits just like Honky. He started toting around a guitar. In fact, he was, for lack of a better term, an Elvis impersonator impersonator.

And it stunk.

The team had no chemistry, and bored fans and critics alike. Valentine looked like a buffoon, and Honky continued to lose steam. About the only good thing that came out of it was Gorilla Monsoon’s dubbing of Valentine “Boxcar”, as in Boxcar Willie. I don’t know why, but that always made me laugh.

Eventually, Valentine left the WWF and met up with Madusa “I’m a C Cup…no wait, D-cup…no, now my breasts are dragging the floor” Micelli and married. Honky Tonk is currently on the independent circuit.

Amazingly, this wasn’t the WWF’s last attempt to resurrect Honky Tonk-Mania…but that’s another post for another time.

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