It seemed as if in the mid 1980’s, anyone could have a cartoon show. There was a Pac-Man cartoon, there was a Dungeons & Dragons cartoon, there was an Ewoks cartoon. The one thing that all these licensed cartoons had in common was the fact that they all sucked (with the exception of the eternally cool D&D cartoon, natch).
So far be it from the WWF to miss on hopping aboard a passing bandwagon. In the mid 80’s, at the height of the Rock & Wrestling connection, the WWF commissioned a cartoon based on the exploits of the WWF superstars.
|Entitled Hulk Hogan’s Rock ‘n’ Wrestling, the show starred, of course, Hulk Hogan (shown here hopping in his ultra chic Hulkmobile), and had the original Hulk Hogan entrance music as its theme. |
Hogan didn’t voice his own character (actually no one did), so the folks doing the show found the worst voice actors they could. Here’s someone who sounds like a constipated Lee Marhsall as the Hulkster.
They also gave Hogan a new catchphrase, that sounded more like something that would come out of the mouth of the Incredible Hulk (you know, big green guy with muscles, as opposed to big orange guy with muscles).
|In addition to Hogan, the cartoon featured many other WWF superstars of the day. |
There was a pre-WWF Home Video Shillin’ Hillbilly Jim, complete with pet porcupine…
|…along with Superfly Jimmy Snuka, who must have snuck into the show right before he got in trouble for beating his girlfriend.|
|Tito Santana tried to out “ARRIBA!” his cellulloid based rival Speedy Gonzales…|
|…and Wendi Richter helped the gang fight the bad guys before she got screwed by Vince McMahon in a much less famous “Montreal” incident at Madison Square Garden.|
|Andre the Giant was also among the good guys, and was stuck with the stereotypical big clumsy oaf gimmick. Think Marmaduke, but not as funny (and yes, we do realize that Marmaduke isn’t funny at all).|
|In addition to travelling through time and fighting panthers in the amazon (two of the actual show scripts), Hogan would fight his in ring rivals, like Roddy Piper (pictured here with Mr. Fuji and Big John Studd)…|
|…and the Iron Shiek and Nikolai Volkoff.|
|The show mainly consisted of “action” and tired old jokes like this one, where Capt. Lou Albano has flooded the kitchen with spaghetti, so he yells “Fire!” to get Andre’s attention.|
|The animation on the show was really bad; it made the Flintstones look like Disney’s Tarzan. |
Just check out the massive number of animation frames to make Rowdy Roddy throw a tantrum.
|Additionally, terrible sound effects were used, like this one when the JYD is gettin’ down. Maybe they should have used Grab Them Cakes instead.|
Thankfully, the show didn’t last long. Maybe a season or two, and it became nothing more than a footnote in WWF history. The WWF has seen fit, however, to re-release the cartoon on video, and can be found at Best Buy retailers nationwide.
Original piano based Hulk Hogan theme, featuring “HULK! HULK!” chant
“Hulk Hogan” (sounding more like a Lee Marshall that hasn’t crapped in a week): “You know, being the champ means you’ve had to earn it. But being the all time champ is something else, dude! It means you gotta keep earnin’ it, and not just inside the ring. And take it from the Hulkster, it doesn’t hurt to have a little help from your friends, ’cause dude, you never know where the next challenge is gonna come from or where the action is gonna take ya!”
Constipated Lee Marshall: “You’re making Hulk MAAAAAAADDDDD!!!”
Andre: “Why did you yell ‘Fire!’, Capt. Lou?”
Capt. Lou: “Nobody would have come if I yelled ‘Spaghetti!'”
Junkyard Dog: “AR AR AR AR!!! You change your mind, little dude, you come see Junkyard. I teach you how to have some real get down good times.”
Sound effect: Ok kids, try this. You too can be a world class cartoon sound effects specialist! Grab an old piece of thin, crappy metal, like something they would make a Renault Le Car out of. Shake it with both hands, so it makes a metal warbling sound. Now as to how this relates to JYD dancing, I don’t quite know, but the producers of the cartoon would know better than me, I suppose.