With Christmas just a few days away, my schedule is super out of whack…so Mailbag today, a Christmas Induction repost on Saturday, and yes, the movie some of you have been asking me to review for no joke TWENTY YEARS hits the site Thursday at 8pm EST. With so much yuletide fun all around us, I’m answering nothing but Christmas questions today! Let’s unwrap those presents, shall we?
Chad A starts us a jingling and jangling with…”What’s the greatest Christmas gift you got when you were a kid?”
As long as “a kid” can be like 13 years old, this is an easy one. I was a huge arcade geek and my favorite machine at the time was Nintendo’s Popeye. Being a big fan of the character helped of course, but the game was a blast too. I wanted it sooooooo badly to play at home, but the video game system I owned, the Magnavox Odyssey2, didn’t have a version. Well, a version I knew of at least, as I discovered it was released in some parts of the world anyway. With that in mind, Ted & Rosie, my wonderful parents, didn’t want to let me down. I hoped they would get me an Atari or maybe a Colecovision so I could play it but they did something way better than that and got me an Atari 1200XL computer with its GREAT port of the game. That led to my lifelong love affair of computers, which, in a very oddball way, led to the creation of this site. Close runner-up would be the following year as I got an Okidata printer (it could print an 8.5″ x 11″ picture of Garfield in about 45 minutes…in full color!) and, far more importantly, a 1050 disc drive. There were some nefarious pirates in my little town who kept me playing a zillion great games. I was in heaven. Unlike the year before when I had no idea what I was getting, that Christmas I KNEW the disc drive was under the tree and my buddy already had tons of floppies ready. I quite literally did not sleep that night. It was unquestionably my favorite Christmas ever…until the Christmas Mrs. Deal showed me a positive pregnancy test which meant RD Jr. was on his way! Impossible to believe he’s eighteen years old now and heading to college in the fall. Yep, Christmas RULES.
Mike M goes all bah humbug with…”If you were casting an all-wrestler version of A Christmas Carol, who’d you cast? (Can be all time or just active)”
I mean, Vince being Scrooge is a given, right? He’d be a great covetous old sinner. Throw in Howard Finkel as Bob Cratchit and I’m in heaven.
Sean B ponders…”Do you think the string to your tin can, Blade Braxton, is giving you a sign this NFL season with his Detroit Lions doing so well?”
I love it that the Lions are so good. Still, I question if I would be allowed to cheer for them since he had that rule that you could only cheer for ONE TEAM. I love you Blade, but SCREW THAT – I’m pulling for the Lions to hoist the Lombardi this year!
Arya W wants to know…”Is Elf On A Shelf really stupid or am I just being old and cranky?”
That stupid little thing caused a good deal of chaos at the Reynolds ranch over the years, as RD Jr was quite vocal when he was young about hating “that little tattletale.” We actually put Elfie in a box in the garage for years simply to avoid any unneeded drama. I’d suggest everyone who is reading this do the same.
Andy G channels his inner Melissa Joan Hart with…”Have you tried to talk Mrs. Deal into getting her to spend the Holiday In Handcuffs(tm)?”
Ahhh, I see what you did there! I’ll deftly side step that and post a picture of the corner of my dining room tonight instead:
There’s something delightfully absurd about these two items sitting next to each other in my dining room. I love it.
Also, how on earth has this movie not obtained Christmas Vacation levels of love? The utter absurdity on display in it matches anything Clark and Eddie did. Seriously, if you’ve never seen it you MUST SEE IT. It’s insane that it ever aired on a family channel as it’s borderline smutty by Christmas movie standards!
Reese K asks…”It’s 1959, K. Gordon Murray studios puts out an audition for English voice acting for a Mexican Santa Claus film. Who are you auditioning for?”
I mean, K. Gordon did the voices for nearly ALL the characters in that film, so why not all of them? I could do some impersonations too, just like…well, you will find out tomorrow night. 😉
That’s what they call a teaser kids – so I will take my leave! Keep sending in those questions rightchere!