The One-Man Rock Band has finally been drafted!

Red Dragons, Bears, and Headlies, oh my!

The Nitro Girls as You’ve NEVER Seen Them Before!

Well, Unless You Were Looking at Horrendous Websites in the Year 2000.

Deadsites Return in a NEW INDUCTION!

Lace-up your Converse and put on your favorite pop punk shirt.

Paige and Alberto Del Rio are headed to Warped Tour!

A Monsoon ruins a WWF event… and I don’t mean Gorilla. (Although he’s there, too)

NEW INDUCTION!

Not everyone was thrilled with The Final Deletion.

Find out who wants out of their TNA contract in Headlies!

Tables vs. Ambulances!

Eh, it’s not as exciting as it sounds.  But hey, you DO get oodles of WCW ineptitude. And that’s ALWAYS fun!

NEW INDUCTION!

The epic conclusion to Broken Matt vs. Brother Nero…if you’ve not seen it, now’s your chance!

THE FINAL DELETION…now at WrestleCrap.com!

There’s nothing more American than cookouts, fireworks, and ankle locks.

Bring your appetite and wave your miniature flags for a patriotic Headlies!

Celebrate the 4th the Matt Hardy Way!

By Shooting Your Brother (Nero) With a Roman Candle!

#GodBlessTheUSA!

Look at the gams on these dames!

 

Wrestlecrap goes back to the Truman years in our newest (and oldest) induction!

It’s been a tough week for Roman Reigns and it’s about to get tougher.

Believe that in a brand-new Headlie!

Impact Wrestling Presents

THROW MICKIE FROM THE TRAIN!

Or into a train.  Whatever, it wasn’t moving.

NEW INDUCTION!

He’s got a resume.

He’s got a letter of recommendation.

Now it’s time for Kane to update his LinkedIn page.

“We’re gonna make this a tag team match, playa!”

Wait, sorry, it’s a wedding.

And it’s our newest induction!

Brock Lesnar is going to be competing at UFC 200 and his opponent will be…

Oh no.

Tell Brother Nero to read all about it in Headlies.

Get your face palms at the ready!

The legendary BUNGEE CORD MATCH is FINALLY inducted!

Say it ain’t so, Cap!

It’s the heel turn that everyone is talking about and it’s only in Headlies!

Fighting off the what???

Step into the asylum in our latest induction!

WrestleCrap is YOUR Home for all things Matt v. Jeff, including over an hour of VIDEO breaking down every second of this comic tragedy!

Well, howdy, sugah!

Dixie Carter wants you to have a taste of her pie and you can only get it in Headlies!

Crockett and Tubbs vs. Albano and Afa!

MIAMI VICE IS LACED WITH A LETHAL INJECTION OF PRO WRESTLING…and it’s INDUCTED!

Rusev campaigns, Rusev wins!

The Bulgarian Brute is about to become the Brazilian Brute in an all-new Headlie.

Pierre the Hardcore Reindeer had a Taxidermied Nose

And if you ever saw him, you could even say he blows!

NEW INDUCTION!

Enzo Amore is “Lost In Seaside Heights”!

Bada-bing, bada-boom, read a new Headlie to find out what’s going on with the realest guy in the room.

Cue up the pyro and ballyhoo!

The Menagerie is here…and they are INDUCTED!

  • "Local Competitor" Already More Likeable Than Randy Orton
  • "Sew JBL's Mouth Shut" Petition Reaches 3.2 Million Signatures
  • Five-Year Old with MS Paint Wins "Create the New Raw Logo" Contest
  • "Good Storylines That Make Sense And Bring In New Viewers" Goes Undrafted
  • Heath Slater Drafted to Wendy's
All The Latest Crap!

Induction: WCW’s Asylum match – La Cage aux Folles

16 Submitted by on Thu, 02 June 2016, 20:00
WCW, 2000 As I’m sure you all know, it was way back in the 1880s that Ferdinand von Lindemann and Karl Weierstrass proved in their eponymous theorem that you can’t square a circle. Still, that hasn’t stopped wrestling announcers from calling the ring a “squared circle” anyway for the past century or so. This week’s induction, however, gave new meaning Continue Reading...
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It Came From YouTube: Scooby-Doo! and WWE: Curse of the Speed Demon Trailer

8 Submitted by on Thu, 02 June 2016, 18:00
Crapper Sean writes The trailer for the WWE’s next animated crossover with Wacky Races, er I mean Scooby-Doo! Not sure how to sum it up except with this one line… I like puppets-Undertaker 2016. I love how LOS MATADORES are in this…despite the fact one member was released and the other two are now travel agents or whatever the hell Continue Reading...
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Headlies: TNA Gets Into The Dessert Business

10 Submitted by on Mon, 30 May 2016, 08:00
Bakersville, TN – TNA Impact Wrestling President Dixie Carter announced this morning that TNA will now be getting into the dessert and baked goods business. “These past few months have been awful stressful and I needed to take my mind off things,” said Carter from the kitchen of her new facility. “So I decided to start baking. It’s real relaxing Continue Reading...
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INDUCTION: Afa and Albano on Miami Vice – Capt. Lou Takes Chokeholds Too Far

15 Submitted by on Thu, 26 May 2016, 20:00
NBC, 1987 Text by Guest Author LeVar Ravel It was the 1980s. America had fallen in love with a sharp-dressed detective in sunglasses and his racial minority sidekick fighting bad guys, with heaping helpings of drugs, murder, and mayhem all amidst the sunbaked glitz of Miami. You know the show. What you may not know is that there was actually Continue Reading...
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Headlies: Rusev Replaces Rouseff As President Of Brazil

4 Submitted by on Mon, 23 May 2016, 08:00
Brasilia, Brazil – In an incredible turn of events that will have repercussions throughout the world, the people of Brazil have chosen WWE Superstar Rusev to replace their current president Dilma Rousseff. Rousseff’s ousting, after once boasting an 80% approval rating, came after impeachment hearings due to economic woes and government corruption. Brazil’s future was thrown into uncertainty after the Continue Reading...
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It Came From YouTube: “Well they call him The Natural…”

12 Submitted by on Fri, 20 May 2016, 02:00
Crapper Thomas Moffatt writes: Here’s a pretty awful theme tune – this time someone who has been involved in more than his fair share of WrestleCrap. Sounding like the theme tune to some 1970’s/1980’s TV crime comedy/drama about a private detective who also competes on the rodeo circuit and attempted to be performed in the style of Waylon Jennings we Continue Reading...
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Induction: Pierre, The Hardcore Reindeer – Did we ever see him and The Barbarian in the same place?

34 Submitted by on Thu, 19 May 2016, 20:00
WWF, 1999 The year 1999 was a hard one for Al Snow. For one thing, that was the year Wal-Mart stopped selling his action figure because it came packaged with a toy mannequin head. See, according to two professors of Communications, the woman’s presumably severed head promoted “the brutalization of women” to young, impressionable boys. It sounded as silly and Continue Reading...
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Headlies: Enzo Amore Is “Lost In Seaside Heights”

4 Submitted by on Mon, 16 May 2016, 08:00
Seaside Heights, NJ – WWE Superstar Enzo Amore, who recently suffered a concussion at the hands of Simon Gotch of the Vaudevillians, has been missing for several weeks following his dismissal from his hospital. It is strongly believed that Amore has suffered an acute case of amnesia, forgetting his name and history in the WWE. Tips began flooding into Titan Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Earthquake action figure with Damien snake accessory!

10 Submitted by on Fri, 13 May 2016, 02:00
Crapper Paul S. writes: Now with this new action figure you can recreate one of the late John Tenta’s most infamous moment’s. That’s right you can SQUASH THE SNAKE! I do like that the figure’s creators went to the effort to put a look of dread on poor Damian’s face. Jake Roberts, Lord Alfred Hayes, and platter full of quake Continue Reading...
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Headlies: Montreal Files Restraining Order Against The WWE

13 Submitted by on Mon, 09 May 2016, 08:00
Montreal, QC, Canada – In an unprecedented move, the city of Montreal has filed a restraining order to World Wrestling Entertainment. Denis Corderre, the mayor of Montreal, addressed the legal notice at a press conference with reporters this afternoon. Flanked by members of Parliament, Montreal Canadiens great Guy Lafleur, a moose, and a plate of Canadian Bacon, Corerre explained the Continue Reading...
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It Came From YouTube: G.L.O.W hotline commercial

2 Submitted by on Fri, 06 May 2016, 02:00
Yes, there was a G.L.O.W (Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling) hotline back in the day. I’m picturing WrestleCrap Radio’s own Nathaniel calling it in a horny fever, making sure to call late at night when his parents are asleep, his heart racing with anticipation that he might be able to get a special message from Becky, The Farmer’s Daughter… “Oh yeah Continue Reading...
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Induction: John Cena vs. Michael Cole – Cena adds a “D” to B.A. S.T.A.R.

25 Submitted by on Thu, 05 May 2016, 20:02
WWE, 2012 Have you heard the big news? John Cena is returning way early from yet another serious injury! This time around, he’s set to return to Raw on Memorial Day, which is only fitting given the history that Cena and Memorial Day have together. Back in 2012, Cena missed the Memorial Day edition of Raw, which drew a frighteningly Continue Reading...
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Headlies: Virgil Buys TNA

7 Submitted by on Mon, 02 May 2016, 08:00
Pittsburgh, PA – TNA’s long-time search for a new buyer came to an end Monday when former WWE and WCW wrestler Virgil bought the company. Dixie Carter joined Virgil at an impromptu press conference in the back of Big Shot Bob’s House Of Wings to discuss the acquisition. “I’m proud of all the great wrestling we’ve put out over the Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Bootleg TNA and WWE puzzles

9 Submitted by on Fri, 29 April 2016, 02:00
Crapper Barry Wilson writes: Well, I’m presuming someone bought this. How about a TNA Impact jigsaw featuring everyone’s favourite TNA wrestler, John Cena! I just love it when bootleggers get sloppy. But wait! There’s more! Thanks to Crapper Paul Rudoff at Spook Central: The Ghostbusters Companion we have more pictures of the bootleg TNA puzzle to look at! Paul writes: I was at the Continue Reading...
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INDUCTION: WWF Microleague Wrestling – The FIRST – and perhaps WORST – WWF Videogame Ever!

31 Submitted by on Thu, 28 April 2016, 20:00
WWF Computer Game, 1987 Want to impress your video game geek friends?  Then quiz them thusly: what, pray tell, was the first ever WWF video game? Be prepared to laugh heartily at them when they no doubt blurt out… WrestleMania on the NES! WRONG! Also, please mock them if they have any fond memories at all of this absolutely atrocious game. Continue Reading...
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Headlies: “Losses Now Count As Wins” Declares Vince McMahon

13 Submitted by on Mon, 25 April 2016, 08:00
Hartford, CT – In the weekly pre-Raw staff meeting, WWE CEO Vince McMahon made a stunning announcement that will change sports entertainment forever. “WWE needs a new shot of adrenaline and I’m about to give it a lethal dose,” said McMahon, sporting a large green hat with a “10/6” note on it. “WWE used to be much more…muchier. It has Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: Enjoy delicious candy straight from The Undertaker’s throat!

10 Submitted by on Fri, 22 April 2016, 02:00
Coming… uh, sometime soon…. it’s WWE Pez Dispensers of The Undertaker, John Cena, and The Rock! Okay, those are sort of cool, but nothing will ever top the Pez Candy Shooter gun target game! Yes, they really sold this to kids back in the 60’s. It was a very different time… You could even use it to re-enact the Steve Austin/Brian Pillman Continue Reading...
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Induction: Barbara “BB” Bush – EMT stood for “Extremely Massive… Technician”

27 Submitted by on Thu, 21 April 2016, 20:00
WWF 1999-2000 Well, Crappers, it seems that after a rocky start, the Divas Revolution has finally achieved its first major success: namely, getting WWE to stop calling it “The Divas Revolution.” In fact, WWE abruptly dropped the whole “Divas” branding entirely, creating a new Women’s title to replace that ridiculous butterfly belt the ladies had been fighting over for years. Continue Reading...
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It Came From YouTube: The greatest Randy Savage promo ever! “NO HOLDS BARRED!”.

11 Submitted by on Mon, 18 April 2016, 12:35
I was reading Scott Keith’s latest Wrestling Observer Flashback covering 1989 and he linked to this amazing promo for the “No Holds Barred- The Movie, The Match” Pay-Per-View featuring The Macho King Randy Savage (does come with crown and scepter as illustrated!), Queen Sherri, and Jiggly Boobs Zeus talking about how they’re going to kill Hulk Hogan and Brutus “The Barber” Continue Reading...
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Headlies: The Authority Accidentally Leaves Fandango Home Alone

8 Submitted by on Mon, 18 April 2016, 08:00
Greenwich, CT – A family vacation by Triple H and Stephanie McMahon was abruptly cut short when they released that they had accidentally left WWE Superstar Fandango home alone. The Authority, who were traveling to Disneyworld for some rest and relaxation, did not notice the missing Fandango when the extended McMahon family piled into Triple H’s minivan nor when they Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: I “figure” your taxes are due today.

9 Submitted by on Mon, 18 April 2016, 02:00
Irwin R. Shyster (otherwise known as I.R.S!) would like to remind Crappers that your taxes are due today! In the unlikely event that you get a tax refund, why not spend that money on access to The WrestleCrap Archives? Oh yeah, and also get yourself one of these awesome I.R.S Hasbro action figures if you have any money leftover. What? Continue Reading...
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