Impact Wrestling Presents

THROW MICKIE FROM THE TRAIN!

Or into a train.  Whatever, it wasn’t moving.

NEW INDUCTION!

He’s got a resume.

He’s got a letter of recommendation.

Now it’s time for Kane to update his LinkedIn page.

“We’re gonna make this a tag team match, playa!”

Wait, sorry, it’s a wedding.

And it’s our newest induction!

Brock Lesnar is going to be competing at UFC 200 and his opponent will be…

Oh no.

Tell Brother Nero to read all about it in Headlies.

Get your face palms at the ready!

The legendary BUNGEE CORD MATCH is FINALLY inducted!

Say it ain’t so, Cap!

It’s the heel turn that everyone is talking about and it’s only in Headlies!

Fighting off the what???

Step into the asylum in our latest induction!

WrestleCrap is YOUR Home for all things Matt v. Jeff, including over an hour of VIDEO breaking down every second of this comic tragedy!

Well, howdy, sugah!

Dixie Carter wants you to have a taste of her pie and you can only get it in Headlies!

Crockett and Tubbs vs. Albano and Afa!

MIAMI VICE IS LACED WITH A LETHAL INJECTION OF PRO WRESTLING…and it’s INDUCTED!

Rusev campaigns, Rusev wins!

The Bulgarian Brute is about to become the Brazilian Brute in an all-new Headlie.

Pierre the Hardcore Reindeer had a Taxidermied Nose

And if you ever saw him, you could even say he blows!

NEW INDUCTION!

Enzo Amore is “Lost In Seaside Heights”!

Bada-bing, bada-boom, read a new Headlie to find out what’s going on with the realest guy in the room.

Cue up the pyro and ballyhoo!

The Menagerie is here…and they are INDUCTED!

  • Roman Reigns Channels Inner Honky Tonk Man, Asks Fans for "Vote of Confidence"
  • PopTV to Replace Impact with Commercials for Zamfir, Master of the Pan Flute; "Hauntingly Beautiful" Reps Note
  • Lesner's Plan to Defeat UFC 200 Foe: Infuriate Him By Repeatedly Calling Him "Mike", Not "Mark"
  • RUMOR: Brock Lesnar Opponent at UFC to Be Ken Shamrock. Or Maybe Kama. Tank Abbot, Perhaps.
  • Matt and Jeff Hardy Shockingly Found To Be In Condition To Work
All The Latest Crap!

Someone Bought This: Chuck E. Cheese NWO Parody Poster

25 Submitted by on Tue, 27 October 2015, 02:00
In the late 1990’s this nWo parody poster hung at Chuck E. Cheese restaurants along with other posters parodying TV shows, movies, albums, and so on. It wasn’t for sale, it was just a store decoration; so I guess technically the only people who bought this was the Chuck E. Cheese chain themselves. Man, Chuck E. looks buff! He must be Continue Reading...
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Headlies: WWE Opens A Haunted House

13 Submitted by on Mon, 26 October 2015, 08:00
Armonk, NY– WWE announced their latest venture outside of professional wrestling with the grand opening of the official WWE Haunted House at the Armonk Halloween Spooktacular and Pie-Eating Contest. WWE CEO Vince McMahon was on hand at the opening of the haunted house. Dressed in pinstripes, McMahon barked at passers-by, saying “Step right up, folks! Step right up! See the Continue Reading...
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It Came From YouTube: 25 years of The Undertaker

3 Submitted by on Sun, 25 October 2015, 22:24
At this year’s Survivor Series WWE will be commemorating the 25th Anniversary of The Undertaker’s debut at the 1990 Survivor Series, and… “Ooooh! I’ll gladly “rise” for that big, studly Zombie fella any night! I’ll make sure he won’t be dead in bed if you knowsk what I mean! Ug-Gug-Gug-Gug!” MAKE LIKE A TREE AND GET OUTTA HERE, GAY POPEYE! ...
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INDUCTION: Halloween Raw 1995 – With Count Todd Pettengill! Ha. Ha. Ha.

32 Submitted by on Thu, 22 October 2015, 20:00
WWF, 1995 Holiday-themed wrestling shows…is there anything better in life? Specifically, look at that Monday Night Raw jack-o-lantern above.  Smoke billowing, candle flickering…gotta say, that is pretty darn cool.  If I had any skill, I’d try to carve that out and put it on the Reynolds Ranch front porch.  Then again, I always take pride in the candy we give out (so Continue Reading...
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Someone Bought This: The WWF… on LASERDISC!

8 Submitted by on Wed, 21 October 2015, 02:00
The WWF released four titles on laserdisc! For you younger readers, Laserdiscs were like really big DVDs that held half a movie on each side. No Holds Barred, Wrestling’s Bloopers Bleeps And Bodyslams, The Best Of Hulk Hogan, and The Best Of WWF Volume 1. As far as I know, these were the only laserdiscs WWE ever released. Screw Blu-Ray! Continue Reading...
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Headlies: Terry Funk To Return In Roadhouse Remake

8 Submitted by on Mon, 19 October 2015, 08:00
Hollywood, CA – Wrestling legend Terry Funk has signed on to appear in the remake of Roadhouse starring MMA star Rhonda Rousey. Funk, who appeared in the original 1989 cult classic starring Patrick Swayze, arrived on set early yesterday morning, despite the movie not being in production until 2016. After body-slamming the studio security guard through a catering table, Funk Continue Reading...
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It Came From YouTube: Judo Andre!

9 Submitted by on Thu, 15 October 2015, 02:00
Crapper Shane Kotlyar writes: Take a look at this late 60’s French movie that has a 21 year old Andre the Giant in it as the biggest Judo fighter I’ve ever seen. It’s crazy to see how nimble and quick he was in his youth. Not to mention his hairstyle looking like he’s one of the Beatles. That is awesome! Continue Reading...
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Headlies: Full Sail University Flooded With Tears After Bayley-Sasha Match

5 Submitted by on Mon, 12 October 2015, 08:00
Winter Park, FL – Full Sail University, home of NXT, is currently in dealing with a flood emergency as a result of record tears following the Bayley vs. Sasha Banks match. The historical match, which took place during NXT Takeover: Respect, had fan-favorite Bayley retaining her title against Banks in an 30-minute Iron Man Match. Emotions, running high throughout the Continue Reading...
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