INDUCTION: WACK – Apparently the term “WACK” meant something different to kids in 2006 than it did to kids in the 80s

19 Submitted by on Thu, 24 March 2022, 20:00

Nickelodeon, 2006

Nickelodeon is no stranger to us here at WrestleCrap. After all, a kids network like that is fertile ground for pro wrestling cross-overs, and has been since we first saw it on cable television.  Heck, even Bobby Heenan and Gorilla Monsoon got in on the action way back in the 1980s (which you can read about here). 

Let’s face it – historically, kids have loved pro wrestling.  Sure, the average demo of wrestling shows today skews older (NXT 2.0 in particular appears to be a huge hit at nursing homes), but by and large kids want the same things wrestling fans do – action, a bit of comedy, and fun storylines.

Unfortunately, today you’ll be getting none of that.

So let us dive into this here progrem, a little oddity dubbed WACK.  I have never seen it before, have no idea what it is all about.  I do know a loyal WrestleCrap Patreon fella (and we’d sure appreciate your support by clicking here) has been asking me to do it and since he has been kind enough to support me the last couple years, I can only do my best by returning the favor.

The intro features characters such as Atomic Banana, Cowabunga, Abominable Snowman, Trouble Nugget, and the Big Cheese.  Has there ever been an actual wrestler named The Big Cheese?  If not, that’s a true missed opportunity.  

I mean, he’d be ripping off our own Paul Kraft, but just kinda seems like a gimme.

Make no mistake about it, this sure looks like an honest to goodness wrestling arena, complete with screaming fans and what appears to be a legitimate wrestling ring.  Not sure why I am so surprised – I mean if Verne Gagne could slap something together for the likes of Kellogg’s, surely Nickelodeon could also afford such a setup. 

Our hosts for the evening are Devon Werkheiser and Lindsey Shaw.  No idea who these two are, but what I do know is Devon is a total dweeb and that Lindsey’s voice is about 5 octaves lower than a girl that age should have.

They go over tonight’s events, which will feature such bouts as Banana vs. Cheese.  I already see them breaking one of the very first rules of pro wrestling…can you guess what it is?

Egads, I’ve watched this show for less than 45 seconds and even I am starting to sound like a kids show host!

We learn our main event was set up by shenanigans at a press conference where Banana had the audacity to hit cheese with a pie.  

If that thing was banana cream, I am pretty sure my NetNanny is gonna block nick.com/WACK.

As the kids talk about the possibility of a new WACK champion, they are interrupted by Abominable Snowman and Cowabunga.  While the bovine wearing sunglasses talks exactly as you’d expect (dude), Snowman doesn’t growl or snarl or shiver at all, instead talking like that English teacher you had in high school who really, REALLY wanted the lead in the community theater production of Hamlet.

(Note to self: there’s gotta be a wrestling pig on this show named Hamlet.  Gotta be.)

We come back from commercial an episode of Jimmy Neutron to learn something happened at the press conference that the main cameras missed.  Thankfully, Snowman had his VCR rolling and procured a videocassette to give us footage of himself and his moo moo friend getting waylaid by The Wholesome Twins.

What, on earth, are these two supposed to be?

 

You said it, sister!

And it’s been too long. Stop by and see us more often, we miss ya!

The cow and ice man demand a match, but in order to get one, it must be sanctioned by…

THE WACK COMMISSIONER.

Hence forth, that is going to be my new go to put down.  

I suggest it be yours as well. 

Anyway, he gives them the match they wanted.

So tonight we get Cow and Snow versus Scary Kate and Bashley.

Ah, so they are a knockoff of the Olsen twins.

Now I (wish I didn’t) get it!

The Big Cheese is back at the punching bag, and talking about how he wants to “drop the wedge.”  

He says this while doing that motion.

I can only imagine what that means.

Did I mention this show is called WACK?

We get a weigh-in for the title bout, and we learn that cheese is sadly five pounds over the weight limit.  Thankfully, a turkey wanders in with a cheese grater and shaves off that weight.

Hopefully no UFC guys were watching this.  I could totally see them trying to do that prior to a big fight.

We get Banana doing some call outs from the message boards next, as well the kid telling us that if you go to this internet site, you can get bios, and I am just quoting here, WACK VIDEOS.

Also, Devon says with a gleam in his eye, “there’s exclusive WACK content.”

Should we really be telling children to head to the internet to watch WACK videos?

Thanks for thinking of the children, Mox!

Next up, they take a kid out of the audience, put a traffic cone on his head, then spin him round and round as he attempts to win prizes.

Seriously. 

Congrats Tyler!

You may be ready to vomite, but you just won a crappy bike that looks like it was made for your grandma!

If you’re asking where the wrestling is on this wrestling show, don’t fret.  Because it’s time to go to the WACK ARENA for our opening contest!

And while you may think that a wrestling match featuring folks in mascot outfits would be horrible, you’d honestly be wrong.

Because it’s way worse than you could possibly imagine.

Still, we get terrible jokes a plenty from Devon and Lindsey:

“That’s gotta burn his buttermilk.”

“Uh oh, where’s the beef?”

“His milk’s gone bad!”

“She’s not ready for da yeti!”

For the record, Cowabunga and Abominable Snowman won via pinfall.

Hoping one of you goes and updates cagematch.net, pretty sure this one isn’t in their archives.

 

After the match, Snowman notes there’s only one thing left to do, turning on Cowabunga in a move straight out of the Paul Orndorff playbook.  

We even get a patented WWE “shocked fan” in the crowd!

I can only guess that Kevin Dunn was watching Nick one afternoon and thought, “This…THIS IS MONEY” and that’s why we get five of those shots at every WWE PPV Premium Live Event now.

Backstage, Mr. Bunga explains that he is “fer sher” gonna get revenge of Snowman, leaving us with this lethal threat: “No fuzzy ice cube’s gonna make jerky out of me!”

I’m halfway through this show and not sure if I should love it or hate it.

(Takes long, hard look at man in cow outfit, with udders protruding from his swim trunks.)

Yeah, I really can’t decide.

Backstage, Banana has a talk with his manager, who I THINK is supposed to be a water bottle. That or he’s supposed to be that guy from Masters of the Universe.  

You know who I’m talking about.

RAM MAN.

One can only hope that Nick owned the rights to that series, or they are gonna get so sued.

On second thought, if they do own the rights, why not make a Masters of the Universe wrestling show?  

I can’t be the only one who’d pay top dollar for a ringside seat for Man at Arms vs. Trap Jaw, right?

First our challenger, hailing from the jungles of Equador, weighing in at 183 pounds of pure potassium.  

I’m no doctor, but that doesn’t sound very healthy.

The champion is of course The Big Cheese, better known to his friends as the Swiss bliss, the meta cheddar, and the wedge hammer.  I was just about to write this show off completely, but his intro music is magnifique. I think we can all agree if we had more songs beginning with the phrase “You want a piece of the cheese”, this would be a far better world.

And remember at the top of the induction when I mentioned that they were breaking a cardinal rule?  Both guys wearing the same colored outfits was what I’s talkin’ bout! Thankfully Devon helpfully explains that Cheese is wearing the red mask and Banana is wearing black. 

Gotta give them props – someone on the staff definitely knew the ins and outs of the grappling game.

So we get the match and…you know what, it’s a million times better than you’d expect from guys in big bulky outfits like that.  It’s not necessarily GOOD mind you, but any match that gives me a hold called the CHEESE GRATER is an automatic win.

You know what I did not need? A move called, with the good Lord above as my witness and I am not making this up, the BANANA HAMMOCK.  Isn’t this a kid’s show?

How many times have I asked that question?

And you know what a match between a banana and a cheese wedge really needs?

Yep – a REF BUMP.

Seeing that dastardly banana clocking the official like that makes me all the more assured that I hated bananas for good reason.

Cheese is able to pick up the duke after going skyward with a big splash.

That they didn’t call his finisher the Fondue seems like a missed opportunity to me.

Lindsey and Devon sign off by telling us to check the website for more details, which are sure to get us ready for WACK’s return in 2007.  Pretty sure that never happened and I’m not going to check.

But get this – Nick apparently believed this would be such a hit that there was a game commissioned for it.  

Seriously!  Behold WACK WRESTLING CHALLENGE!

Scoff if you will, but it’s way better than another wrestling game with the word “challenge” in the title.

But that, Crappers, is an induction for another day. 


Thanks for reading another WrestleCrap induction! If you’d like to support us for 22 years (!!!) of the very worst of pro wrestling, we’d love for you to throw a buck or two our way over on our Patreon, which you can access by clicking here. Thanks!

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Yeah, you know...the WrestleCrap guy. Been here since before day 1, I have. You can hang out with me on Facebook. (I'm on there quite a bit) or follow my exploits on Twitter (I'm on there not quite so often). Thanks, and Keep on Crappin'!
19 Responses to "INDUCTION: WACK – Apparently the term “WACK” meant something different to kids in 2006 than it did to kids in the 80s"
  1. Brady DiCarlo says:

    I remember watching a lot of Nickelodeon around this time and I have no recollection of this.

  2. Sean Bateman says:

    Guess that “the Big CHeese” Paul Kraft had to start somewhere before working for the ‘Crap

  3. Dave says:

    There is an English boxer called Ted Cheeseman whose nickname is “The Big Cheese”.

    The UK boxing press had a lot of fun when he fought (and I’m not making this up) Sam Eggington. Helped that it was a very good fight, but we were all really tuning in for the omelette gags.

  4. Leia says:

    Nickelodeon dares ask the question: What if CHIKARA sucked?

    (I’d say “and wasn’t made by a sex pest” but let’s be real, Dan Schneider was probably involved somewhere)

  5. Garrett says:

    You might want to rewrite this article.

    I went to wikipedia about this show and WACK stood for Wrestling Association of Championship Krushers. You didn’t mention that part of this “federation.”

  6. Al Boondy says:

    Apparently, these characters were based off of a “Danny Phantom” Flash game and a 2002 Nickelodeon PSA about eating healthy? Don’t know how accurate this information is, but it SEEMS plausible:


    Abominable Snowman and Cow-A-Bunga were used for for the Daily Nick U-Pick, Trouble Nugget & the Wholsome Twins were based off characters from another Nickelodeon Wrestling Promotion for the hour-long Danny Phantom Ultimate Enemy special, called the Danny Phantom Ultimate Enemy Face-Off, a promotion where Nick.com users play a flash game where they customize their own danny phantom ghost and use them to battle other ghosts (game that was recreated with a Spongebob theme recently, surprised they didn’t do the same promotion as well), and if you got a high score on it your ghost gets to wrestle in a week long promotion where the two matches for 4 days (Monday-Thursday), and on Friday during the premiere of the special, the winners of each day team up in a Tag Team tournament to sees who’s the best (and as I remember the characters that made Wholesome Twins won that tournament), and the rest of the wrestlers (the Big Cheese, Atomic Banana, the Turkey Gobbler, and Coach Waterbottle) were based off a 2002 Nickelodeon PSA for eating healthy with a big jingle and all (also there were 2 wrestlers that was promoted but never came in the ring, a female wrestler named BLING and an Eyeball monster based off of another Danny Phantom Ultimate Enemy Face-Off ghost named Bloodshot)

  7. Thomas Moffatt says:

    I hate both cheese and bananas so I was they type of person hoping the lighting rig above the ring would collapse on both of them a la Hanson vs the Spice Girls…

    The cheese’s intro music made me think of F Zero…

  8. Gerard says:

    if you think this show is the most bizarre wrestling show out there you should checkout Kaiju big battel!! its a comedy wrestling feeration featuring guys in foam costumes getting in a ring and wrestling each other!!

  9. Statistician says:

    STATISTICALLY… This is the 24th induction from the year 2006. 2006 now has 1 more induction to its name than 2007, and is now the undisputed Crappiest of the past 20 years (2003-2022).

  10. Kevin Lonergan says:

    We need to see AEW Vs. Kaiju Big after this induction ASAP!!!!!

    Moxley Vs. Dr. Cube anyone???

    Tony Khan….this has $$$$$$$$ written all over it!!!

  11. Meegan Tox says:

    2006… that would make me about 16 at the time, I didn’t really watch much Nickelodeon at this point but I do recognize the hosts/commentary team or whatever were from some show about “school survival” and I think WACK is a much better gig than that show. That being said, I do not remember this or anything that lead up to it…

    Oddly enough, after doing a quick google search… Schneider’s Bakery was miraculously not involved with either “Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide” or W.A.C.K. even though Dan was pretty much everywhere in that company for a really long time

    • SyntheticManiac says:

      I could tell Dan Schneider wasn’t involved with this. The female co-host managed to keep her shoes on the whole time.

  12. Enhancement Talent 3 Mark II says:

    Great stuff again RD. I’m proud to admit that I knew what you were talking about right off the bat. Those 2 great workers did look quite similar.

  13. CF says:

    All this needed was a Special Guest Ref appearance by Noddy Holder. 🙂

  14. Charles says:

    Thank you for doing my suggestion, Mr. Rd, and I was happy to see you do it.

  15. Gart Chase says:

    To be fair, as a children’s introduction to wrestling this could have been a lot worse.

  16. Maverick Mopete says:

    I’ll be honest.

    When I first say the name “WACK”, I thought this was an induction that involved the classic Nick ‘Game Show’ “Wild And Crazy Kids” (The show that goes anywhere and does anything to find kids having fun!)

    This is so much funnier, though.

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