Headlies: Daniel Bryan Changes His Catchphrase to ‘Maybe!’

6 Submitted by on Mon, 26 August 2013, 08:00


Aberdeen, WA – WWE Superstar Daniel Bryan has changed his definitive catchphrase of “Yes!” to a more neutral chant of “Maybe!”

Following the loss of the WWE Championship to Randy Orton mere seconds after defeating John Cena, the volatile Bryan has gone into a mode of self-reflection and introspection. “Despite my years of dominating on the independent scene, I’ve come to learn that things are not so cut-and-dry in the WWE. Just because you reach the top of the mountain doesn’t mean that you’re king of the hill,” said the hirsute Bryan. “’Yes!’ and ‘No!’ are just too simple for the complex world of the WWE. ‘Maybe!’ is the only true answer.”

Bryan stared out a rain-soaked window in silence for several seconds. With a drawn-out sigh, Bryan continued, “Before I was a ball of emotion. At first chanting “No!” and then “Yes!” Life isn’t quite that easy. I see that now. My mentor, His Holiness, The Dalai Lama, has taught me all about the importance of ending desire and the Middle Path.”

Bryan’s former tag team partner and life mate Kane said, “Daniel is an enigma, wrapped in a puzzle, wrapped in a beard. He is a phenomenal wrestler and a true dazzler. Whether he’s taking on John Cena, or the Shield, or a wild bear, Daniel gives 110%, both physically and emotionally. Unfortunately, that emotion gets the best of him. By changing to ‘Maybe!’ perhaps Daniel can weigh his options and find the inner peace he needs.”


The Dazzler in his more emotional days

“Buddha once said ‘Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.’ I completely agree,” said Bryan. “Through meditation, soft music, and lots and lots of JBL’s anti-energy drink ‘Drank’, I’ll be able to calm down and say ‘Maybe!’ Like ‘Do I want to have another hummus and bean sprout wrap?’ “Maybe!’ ‘Do I want to be in the next season of Total Divas?’ “Maybe!'”

Bryan’s new catchphrase has already been put to the test as he has been asked if he would like his storyline with the McMahons to extend all the way to Money In The Bank next year.

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From the Northeast by way of Parts Unknown.
6 Responses to "Headlies: Daniel Bryan Changes His Catchphrase to ‘Maybe!’"
  1. "The Big Cheese" Paul Kraft says:

    I’d totally buy a “Maybe!” shirt.

  2. Emerson Witner says:

    I have a MAYBE! t-shirt.

  3. Thomas Moffatt says:

    I think we should have a Headlies competition such as “WMXXXI Venue Decided – Sheamus Not To Be Advised on Location” or “Vince McMahon Views Gross Hot Tub Incident on YouTube – Entire WWE Roster on Warning Standby”…

  4. Lex Icon says:

    Unfortunately, this would be gimmick infringement due to Southern California Independent Pro wrestler Brett “The Maybe Kid” Walters.

  5. Michael Maiello says:

    One cool thing they could do would be to encourage the audience the chant “what” whenever he says yes or no. Because science has proven that such a thing would never ever get old or become annoying.

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