Headlies: Bad Influence Live Up To Their Name, Corrupt Innocent TNA Talent

15 Submitted by on Sat, 27 July 2013, 09:00


Nashville, TN – The TNA tag team known as Bad Influence, consisting of Kazarian and Christopher Daniels, have been living up to their namesake and causing problems in the locker room. Though the two had been wrestling for several years in the company, it wasn’t until they officially joined forces that their habits and attitude started affecting others.

“Kazarian and Daniels are two nogoodniks,” said a frustrated Dixie Carter. “They skip training, stay out all night. I even caught them smoking in the bathroom once. It’s bad for the company and I think they may be affecting some of the good boys. I walked into Jeff Hardy’s room and a funny-smelling smoke came billowing out. He said it was just incense, but I’m not so sure.No one has seen Scott Steiner in months. Just the other day, I made a lovely meatloaf dinner for everyone and Chris Sabin told me it ‘sucked’. He must have picked up that word from Bad Influence because no one else at TNA would ever say something here sucked.”

The tag team’s carefree and reckless attitude has spread to other members of the TNA roster. Kenny King refuses to take the trash out, Wes Brisco has given up his paper route, and Samoa Joe hasn’t turned in his homework in months. “I’m at my wit’s end,” said Carter. “I absolutely hate firing people. Maybe I can just send them to their rooms or take away their Playstation for a week.”

“They’re just so cool,” said a gushing AJ Styles. “Cool jackets, those sweet hand jestures, and all those flips. I hope I can be like them one day.”

“We do what we want, when we want,” said Kazarian. “Maybe we’ll wrestle on Impact, maybe we won’t. Just like when we were in Fortune.”

“We were in Fortune?” said Daniels.

Written by

From the Northeast by way of Parts Unknown.
15 Responses to "Headlies: Bad Influence Live Up To Their Name, Corrupt Innocent TNA Talent"
  1. "The Big Cheese" Paul Kraft says:

    Ha! Good one, Joran.

  2. bret_owen99 says:

    I thought this was a great article….up until Dixie said she hated firing people……

  3. James Mitchell says:

    I was especially amused by the idea that Wes Brisco was a paper boy. In fact, the idea that all the TNA roster are errant children was amusing, full stop!

  4. KyleJordan says:

    Another way could have been said people were taking after them and started delivering good matches and entertaining promos. Don’t they know the spotlight is supposed to be for the Hogans.

  5. Sir Thomas says:

    That explains why I keep seeing them in detention every other day.

  6. Autrach Sejanoz says:

    Great work, Jordan. The last line was priceless!

  7. John Matrix says:

    Bad Influence also encourage the younger TNA wrestlers to come with them and throw rocks at hornet nests.

  8. Porter "Budsgrand" Sultzbaugh says:

    Dixie Carter: “I even caught them smoking in the bathroom once.”

    What was Dixie Carter doing in the men’s bathroom?

  9. Down With OPC says:

    I heard Dixie threatened to take away Kurt’s learner’s permit.

  10. Big wiggle says:

    They have no buisness corrupting that jeff hardy..hes going places

  11. Jeremy says:

    What about that time they threw toilet paper all over old man Hogan’s house?

  12. Jack says:

    Best headlie in weeks.

  13. Superstarl says:

    “no one else at TNA would ever say something here sucked.”

    Gold. Freaking gold.

  14. Mr Maddog says:

    Heard they even crashed a baby shower…

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