Text By Neil Cathan

What if...Muhammad Hassan Didn't Leave WWE?

November 4th, 2005: WWE Smackdown

 

A brown door in a white corridor, half open. John Bradshaw Layfield, hat in hand, body between frame and door, blocking the camera from seeing who he is talking to. His voice is firm, polite and slow. His words: "There's been a lot of anger about what we did on Tuesday, but you and me, we both know it was the right thing to do. The only thing we could do. Right now, what's important is that we lose the masks. That shows people that we're not ashamed of what we did. The rest of them are anxious. They won't do it. But they respect you in a way they don't respect me. They have to. If you take that mask off, they'll follow suit." There's a pause. Something is whispered behind a closed door. JBL smiles sadly, and puts his hat back on his head, tilting his head downwards to do so. He keeps it there for a while, as if the ground were fascinating. He mutters "sorry you feel that way" at the floor, and backs off.

 

November 7th, 2005: WWE RAW

 

Another message from Kurt Angle, from another hotel room. He holds in his hand the WWE title. "There were no winners on Tuesday. Kurt Angle is a man of his word. He said that if he was beaten, he would hand this belt over. Well, he was not beaten. I hate what I'm having to do here. USA, here's the beat. Survivor Series. I find four men to have my back, and I'm sure there's at least five looking to put a knife there. We lay it all down. You have control, and do what you wish with me if I lose. I have control if I win. Either way, I'll hand Cena back that belt after the match. He's the champion, he won it. If I want it, I need to beat him."

 

November 11th, 2005: WWE Smackdown

 

During a JBL/Benoit match over the US title, the commentary team mention that USA has accepted Kurt Angle's challenge, and have allowed anyone from RAW or Smackdown to throw their hat in with or against Angle, on the condition that Angle bring the belt to Survivor Series, and makes no appearances on RAW before then. The match itself swings heavily in Benoit's favour, until the huge man in the American flag mask storms the ring. He drops Benoit with a clothesline, and Benoit's just lucky it didn't leave his head in the third row. The bell rings. The big guy and JBL put the boots to Benoit. Regal rushes down with a steel chair. A shot collides with the big man's skull, but he barely stumbles. Another clothesline drops Regal, and the big guy is just pulling Regal up when his bandannas are pulled down from behind. They hang about his neck like an albatross. The fans and the announce desk register their shock as Batista turns around to JBL. JBL backs off, his hands high. A boot catches him in the gut, and he is laid out with a Batista Bomb, before Batista jumps the ropes and moves to the back, his head in his hands.

 

November 14th, 2005: WWE RAW

 

"You'll hand me the belt back, Kurt?" Cena roars "You'll just hand me it back? Oh, I'm so grateful! No, forget that. Survivor Series - I'm coming to tear it from your cold dead hands. Count me as the first man on the other team!" Drums, fog and the words 'You think you know me' from the stage. Enter Edge.

"John, I can't believe I'm about to say this, but I'm with you. Kurt screwed me out of taking you out in TLC, and he looks to keep on screwing me. Now I know lying, I'm damn good at lying, so believe me when I tell you that he's lying! He'll bring the belt, but if his team looks like its losing, he'll head for the hills again! You and me, we've got to be there, we've got to take it from him our own selves. That's order of business one. I'm the second man. After Kurt's gone, and you've got your pudgy fingers around that belt again, order of business two is getting that damn rematch!"

 

Shelton Benjamin defends his intercontinental gold against Ric Flair later in the night, dropping him with a superkick after a fifteen minute back and forth. After the match, he calls for a microphone, and paces the ring.

 

"Kurt called me last week. He said that men like me, great wrestlers, world-class athletes, that was who he wanted to build RAW around when he was in charge, and he said that if I wanted the chance I deserve, all that had to happen was for him to win at Survivor Series. Best way for that to happen, he says, is if I'm on his side. It's a lot to think about. See, as an athlete, as a wrestler, I respect Kurt. I know Edge reckons he's a lying scumbag on every count, but I even respect Kurt's word. Kurt tells me he's going to give me the chance I deserve, I believe him. But what I don't respect, what I can't respect, is Kurt's war here. I can't respect him biting the hand that feeds him with USA. I can't respect him standing with that gold in his hands when he didn't win it. But that doesn't mean I have any love for a man like Edge, who we're supposed to trust after all the lies. And I sure as hell have no love for John Cena, a champion who can't keep his own damn belt. See what I just did, John? Wrestled fifteen minutes with one of the best in the world? See this belt, firmly in my possesion? Yeah, that's how a real champion, hell, a real man carries it. I'm sitting this one out, and I'm leaving an open challenge. Any wrestler can come to that ring at Survivor Series for a shot at this belt, and I will beat them, and I will walk away, still the champion."

 

November 18th, 2005: WWE Smackdown

 

It is of no surprise to anyone when JBL comes down to the ring and names himself the second man on Angle's team. The big reaction comes when Batista strolls onto the stage, World Heavyweight Title over his shoulder and microphone in his hand. JBL gets the first word out, in a fast, scared voice: "Dave, Dave! Look, I had to do it. I had to! They had to know that a man like you, a man these fans love, a champion, that he was on our side, that he knew our side was right!"

"John, shut up." Batista growls. "You talk too damn much. Its my turn. Yeah, I know why you did what you did. Don't think that means I like it. Or you. But that can wait. You'll get yours, but not until after Survivor Series, because at Survivor Series, we're both fighting for what matters most. We're both fighting for Kurt Angle, and for America. I was born and raised in Washington. You've got to believe that made me a real patriot."

 

Regal and Benoit team up later in the night, and make quick work of the returning Mexicools, represented by Juventud Guerrera and Psicosis. After the match, they throw in against JBL and Batista, and by extension, Kurt Angle. The team against Angle now has four.

 

November 21st, 2005: WWE RAW

 

"Bradshaw, Batista, you make me sick." Benjamin hisses "The rest of your cowards behind masks too. What they did at Taboo Tuesday, I've been in an angry, sick mood since that. So Angle, before, I was willing to sit this one out. But if those are the kind of people rallying around you, calling you a champion, calling you the leader this show needs, then I have to re-evaluate just where I stand, because it can't be with you, and it can't be watching you rise and rise to the top. I am the last man for the team against you, and I will fight until my last breath to keep you from power." He backs off from the camera, leaving Todd Grisham to look as bemused as ever on his own. Something like stupid shock crosses his face when Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch jump Shelton Benjamin further down the corridor. They put the boots to him, shouting traitor, shouting turncoat, calling him a boy. They march past the camera, and Cade growls "four and five."

 

A video package set within a cold and dark room hits the screens. The camera moves in closer, and from the darkness appear the faces of Muhammed Hassan and Carlito, skin darkened by bruises. Hassan laughs hoarsely, then all laughter leaves his face, and he stares the camera in the eye "You really thought we were done with? I know that was the idea, that or, at the very least 'teach us a lesson' as a bully like Angle might phrase it" he pauses "and we were taught a lesson, weren't we, Carlito?"

Carlito tosses an apple casually between his hands, and gives the camera a rictus grin "We were, we were taught that you didn't want Carlito to be cool." he tosses the apple over his shoulder "You didn't want a guy who was just there to have fun, make money, win titles. You don't want Muhammed Hassan the wrestler, you treated him like a whipping boy."

"You see Hassan's skin, and his clothes, and his voice, and you make all of that the enemy, because that's the simplest way of seeing your world, that's the only way that makes any damn sense to you. You see a Muslim, and you see a terrorist, they're just two spellings of the same word to you. Okay then. I am an accommodating man. The terrorist is who you get from now on."

Carlito reaches down, and from his boot comes a long knife. The red light from the camera plays along its cruel curves, staining the knife red. Carlito lets out a long whistling laugh, a laugh like a cold wind that blows through your bones on a winter night. He looks up, and beneath the madness in his eyes is calculation and sorrow. "And if we're just our heritage to you, if we are just the worst of what you barely know and hardly understand, if we are just the secret fears crouching in the dark, waiting for your ignorance to stumble by so that it can strike, if we are all of that, and you have made us all of that, then let me promise you, I will be the bloodshed of Puerto Rican wrestling. I will be the spitting blood, I will be the fireball, I will be the knife at your head, carving memories into your brain. I will be your Puerto Rican nightmare, WWE, and you will wake up only when I can't wash the blood out any more, because the stain of it is inescapable."

 

November 25th, 2005: WWE Smackdown

 

The talk throughout the show is on the main event, and on the star studded Survivor Series match, which will see the WWE champion John Cena and the Intercontinental champion Shelton Benjamin on one side, and the World Heavyweight Champion Batista, the US champion JBL and the tag champions Cade and Murdoch on the other. The main event of the night will pit JBL and Batista against John Cena and Shelton Benjamin, in a battle where every man has a title. Cena and Batista are rarely in the ring together for any real length of time, although the crowd pops huge every time it happens. It's a fairly even affair, until the inevitable run ins end it. Pretty soon, the ringside area has broken into a ten man brawl, and the referee is ringing the bell as if that has ever stopped anyone, ever.

 

November 27th, 2005: WWE Survivor Series

 

Angle's team makes their way out first. JBL stands with Angle as buffer between him and Batista, who he keeps throwing nervous looks at. The three of them are flanked by Cade and Murdoch. The other team comes out. Cena looks determined, Edge lazy. Benjamin is obviously looking to prove himself, and is eyeing up the other wrestlers. Regal and Benoit flank the group, their fingers twitching with the desire to stretch their enemies. A pile of gold quickly amasses on the time-keeper's table. When they enter the ring, Angle offers his hand to Benjamin, who hesitates before shaking it. Cena throws him a dirty look for this fraternising with the enemy, while Edge lounges, looking amused by all of this tension. Regal and Benoit look the opposite, as deadly serious as ever. Something unspoken passes between Benjamin and Angle, and they send their teams to their respective sides. Angle's team is willing to follow his leadership, while Cena and Edge both seem reproachful at the young gun giving orders. What follows when both teams are back in their corners is a dazzling display of chainwrestling between Angle and Benjamin that comes to an abrupt end when Cade quick tags himself in.

Cade and Murdoch then separate Benjamin from his corner and use quick tags to beat Benjamin down. Neither are a match for him in a one on one fight, and they seem to know this, tagging out to the other whenever they find themselves in trouble. Angle looks disgusted at their cowardice, but seems to reconcile himself with the knowledge that this is just one night, the Intercontinental champion will be getting his dues when he's in charge. He's torn on how to react when a superkick from Benjamin puts Cade out of the match.

Murdoch comes in next, but is put away with a powerslam, before Benjamin hurtles to the other side to make the tag. In comes Cena, who obliterates Murdoch in short order. Angle buries his head in his hands, and his despair is only deepened when he looks behind him to see the WWE title missing from the timekeeper's table on which he left it. Edge gets back on the apron, and drops it behind him, grinning. Angle comes in next, and seems to have Cena's number, grounding him with mat wrestling. Cena begins to launch a comeback, but its cut off by a quick tag to Batista. The crowd roars its approval at seeing these two together in the ring. The two champions circle each other, before tying up. Batista pushes Cena back into the turnbuckle, and starts to bury knees into his gut, but is cut off, as Edge slides into the ring with a steel chair, and brings it crashing down onto the head of Batista. The bell is quickly rung to signal Edge's removal from the match. Edge shrugs, and laughs, before leaving. Cena glares at Edge in confusion, but still hoists Batista onto his shoulders for the F-U, only for Angle to clip his knees out. This draws Benjamin into the ring, which draws JBL in, which draws Regal and Benoit in, as the ring quickly turns into a crazed melee. Order is restored by virtue of all men being downed, as Cena and Batista, the last two standing, hit each other with clotheslines and both fall. Men return to their corners, and the champions both move away to make the tag. In comes Regal, and in comes JBL. The two brawl, forgetting to wrestle in their mutual hatred. Regal starts to stretch JBL, remembering his strength in the contest, but JBL is able to shift the position into a pin, hands on the tights, three count, three left on each team.

Benoit storms in, and won't let JBL get away from chops, dropkicks, elbows and suplexes. JBL begins to turn things around after a thumb to the eye, and staggers away to make the tag, only for Batista to let himself drop from the apron, pulling Angle with him. JBL's back is to Benoit, leaving him helpless against a trio of german suplexes, capped off with a diving headbut for three. While the headbut put JBL away, it also leaves Benoit stunned, and it doesn't take long for Angle to capitalise on this, hitting an Angle Slam to put Benoit away for three.

Benjamin jumps the ropes, and him and Angle pick up where they left off, only this time harder and faster, trading blows and suplexes as well as holds. The end looks to come when Angle hoists Benjamin up for the Angle Slam, only for Benjamin to again counter with a crucifix. This time, however, Angle is expecting it, and rolls through, grabbing Benjamin's ankle into an Angle Lock. Cena charges the ring, but is cut off with a Batista clothesline. Benjamin taps furiously, and Cena is left on his own. Cena puts up a valiant struggle, but he would he hard pressed to beat either of these men on their own. As a team, they dominate him, and the only question is how and when he'll be taken out, not if. The how is a Batista Bomb, the when is ten minutes in, at the end of a hot surge where, for almost two whole minutes, Cena was able to fend off both Angle and Batista. Turning around from F-Uing Angle over the ropes, he finds himself kicked in the gut, and powerbombed fiercely. It is over. Angle has taken control. 'You Think You Know Me' blares over the speakers, and out comes Edge, Money In The Bank briefcase in hand. He runs tot he time-keeper's table, and announces he's cashing in his shot. Cena bravely struggles to his feet, but is cut down with a spear. Cover, one, two, three.

 

"A new champion and a new GM, all in one match!" squeals King.

"Is that what they are?" sighs JR "I can just see a couple of thieves."

 

The End.