WrestleCrap Power Crappings Week XXVI

24 Submitted by on Tue, 16 July 2013, 13:25

Once again, WrestleCrap is back with its brand new, weekly interaction, in which Our Loyal Crappers decide what the worst in wrestling was for the past week. They can choose gimmicks, storylines, news stories, or anything else that constitutes “Crap”, and the votes are tallied in order to determine the WORST in wrestling…..at least for this week!

1. Baltimore fans chant “Husky Harris” at debuting Bray Wyatt (NR)

I always wondered how a city could cheer a double-murderer as a star linebacker. And then last Monday reminded me, oh yeah: they’re all sociopaths.

bray
2. The Vickie Guerrero job evaluation (NR)

Because more McMahons equal more ratings, right USA? If I want to see a wankfest, there’s torrents I can download. And even then, no thank you.

eval
3. Randy Orton wins “All Stars” Money in the Bank (NR)

The only thing that could’ve silenced Philadelphia more would be the shock of signing a good goalie. That WWE, they know their audience.

ortonmitb
4. Brad Maddox (10)

8:02 PM EST, July 15: Maddox arrives, I channel surf, get engrossed in MLB’s home run derby, don’t turn back to Raw. Just letting you know, WWE.

maddox
5. Ryback is now a whiner (NR)

Remember this character quirk six months from now when they turn him into a bad ass babyface again. WWE’s hoping that you’ll forget.

ryback
6. John Cena makes Mark Henry submit decisively (NR)

I guess Mark Henry doesn’t have a bevy of sick children whom admire him. If he did, he’d never, EVER give up. Right Cena?

henry
7. Miz as a babyface (11)

26 for 26, and he made it easier on himself this time. I guess WWE expected a pop in Philly when Miz had Heyman kicked out from ringside. Yeah.

miz
8. The McMahon Power Struggle (1)

Let’s be honest: power struggles haven’t been cool since Austin and the McMahons had their ladder match in 1999. They have all sucked since.

mcvic
9. The Bella Twins (NR)

A campaign began in these comment threads to get them on here. And thus, the “professional celebrities” have made it. Go grassroots efforts!

bellas
10. TNA releases Matt Morgan (NR)

Finally, a TNA entry! Morgan asked for his release, but it speaks to how TNA misused an athletic giant who was willing to work hard. Alas.

morgan
11. Sheamus as a babyface (5)

Looks like some sympathy for his MITB injuries bought him leniency this week. Get well soon, big guy. So we can mock your awful acting again.

sheamus
12. Dolph Ziggler’s unfunny disruption of Alberto Del Rio vs. Sin Cara (NR)

Where is it written that every babyface has to be an unlikable assknuckle? WWE doesn’t paint broad strokes; they use a friggin’ paint roller.

adrdolph
13. Four former FCW/NXT talents list off charges of mistreatment against Bill DeMott (8)

Very little has come out of these accusations, ever since WWE’s “what a bunch of whiners” press release. Maybe hoping it goes away?

demott
14. Payment issues result in number of TNA releases, including many Gut Check participants (3)

The bleeding seems to have stopped, and we can hope TNA has their ducks in a row. But anyway, here’s one last look at the lovely Taeler Hendrix.

taeler
15. WWE Total Divas coming to E! (NR)

Cameron is the only one depicted, to my knowledge, that isn’t dating a WWE wrestler. I wonder what much of the highly-shallow E!’s focus will be on?

divas

Written by

Justin Henry is WrestleCrap's inquiring newsman, thirsting for knowledge always. He enjoys the art of satire, as you'll find in many of his works here at WrestleCrap. Drop him a line on Facebook (http://www.facebook.com/notoriousjrh) and Twitter (http://www.twitter.com/jrhwriting)
24 Responses to "WrestleCrap Power Crappings Week XXVI"
  1. Eddie says:

    As a born Baltimorian, we’re not all sociopaths. Some, however, are just plain stupid, and unfortunately, some of those people bought tickets to RAW. Those people can go fuck off.

    /no longer living in Baltimore

  2. patricko says:

    In this day and age of wrestling fans becoming an increasingly large part of the show (not supoorting this, simply stating fact), you’re gonna whine that a crowd called a wrestler by his previous gimmick name? Jesus-willy, how is this crap?

    No, seriously – why is this a big deal?

    When Albert came back as Tensai, and the crowd was calling his old name, and chanting “shave your back” where was the outrage?

    • Justin Henry says:

      while I can’t speak for others, I did find the Albert chants to be annoying. His ‘gimmick’ as Tensai was that, yes, he was Albert, but he had been reborn in Japan with a new warrior instinct. Fans chanting “ALLLLL-BERRRRRT” weren’t exactly getting over on WWE with some clever coup; they ACKNOWLEDGED his past as Albert.

      And don’t look at me: I’m merely reporting the votes of the WrestleCrap followers. But I agree with them: what was the point of taking an awesome moment, and then using it to prove you knew what his prior gimmick was? Why not chant “CHAVO’S CADDY” at Dolph, or hell, “ISAAC YANKEM” at Kane?

      There’s being clever, and then there’s trying to convince people that you’re clever.

    • Paul says:

      Agreed, Patricko. Everything from 2-9 is far, far worse than the Husky Harris chants. Fans can act so butthurt sometimes. It’s like someone told them that Santa Claus isn’t real.

    • Stephen says:

      The big problem is that it represents everything people dislike about stereotypical “smart marks”. How obnoxious and self-involved do you have to be to chant a wrestler’s previous gimmick name just because you remember it? It’s childish, pointless and is just a cry for attention.

      • The Gold Standard says:

        Smart Marks are bad, but so are dedicated marks. WHAT chants still won’t die. When Steve Austin was doing that, the crowds would chant WHAT at the National Anthem.

        There’s nothing wrong with the crowds having fun….but smart marks and dedicated marks are obnoxious and tend to kill the fun for the average fan that wants to suspend their disbelief. They also annoy workers, but that’s for another day

    • Nickety-Split says:

      I was pissed at them chanting Albert too.

      • patricko says:

        I agree with y’all. I look at crowd response to wrestling back in the day, when they would cheer faces, boo heels, and be appreciative of quality in-ring action.

        Not sure why the smarks felt they needed to become part of the show. You wonder if many of them even actually ENJOY wrestling. Go to any decent indy show and you see the same behavior, but at far more concentrated of level, because there’s only a couple hundred people there.

        I freakin’ hate the behavior, but it’s such a part of shows now that isolating one incident over… a million others seems odd to me.

  3. James Mitchell says:

    Matt Morgan is dreadful.

  4. Thomas Moffatt says:

    Remember – Natalya is now married to Tyson Kidd so that means the Khali/Natalya/Shiteswoggle are now eligible for a WrestleCrap induction…

  5. Art0Donnell says:

    It’s amazing that Ray Lewis had time to keep playing thirteen more seasons in Baltimore. Usually people convicted of murder have to go to jail for a long time.

    Tell me, what verdict did the jury reach on Ray Lewis, again? I forgot.

    • Justin Henry says:

      that was the beauty. He dimed his two friends that had nothing to with it, as there was a lack of DNA evidence. The starstruck DA gave him lesser charges, and never did ask the location of the suit Lewis was wearing that night, which has never been found.

      • Art0Donnell says:

        Ah, so Ray Lewis single-handedly killed two people without justification. Glad you know for a fact more about what happened that night than the police or attorneys ever did.

        Vince McMahon was once accused of rape, but was never tried for it. Should I thus refer to Vince as a rapist every time I mention the chairman and condemn all WWE fans for cheering a product put out by an unrepentant sex criminal?

        And I have never met a Ravens fan who ever actually thought Ray killed anyone.

      • Art0Donnell says:

        Moreover, if the best evidence against a person is a *lack* of evidence against that person, that’s a pretty weak case.

        How about not declaring people guilty of capital crimes and casually presenting your particular gut instinct about an unsolved and extremely murky case as fact? A simple qualifying adjective like, “alleged” or “accused” goes a long way in changing libel into a routine raising of questions.

        And how about not castigating an entire city for not sharing your hunch?

  6. Raging_Demons says:

    Oh the bleeding hasn’t stopped for TNA. Add Tara & The D.O.C. to that list. With Madison Rayne not wanting to re-sign that makes it 8 total so far!

    • patricko says:

      They’ve a very full roster, for 2 hours of TV a week, and six matches a night on their live cards. Plenty of talent doesn’t appear on TV regularly as it is. thinning the roster out isn’t a bad thing, in and of itself.

      A&8′s is bloated, and mostly used as a mob at this point, so one fewer guy in the group won’t be missed. of course, there are other less talented guys they could have cut.

  7. Jerichoholic Ninja says:

    Some fans are stupid. Instead of enjoying the show and enjoying the debut of a wrestler with a new character, they have to show how “smart” they are and essentially saying “Ha ha WWE, we’re smarter than that!”

    I’m pretty sure if todays fans were arround in the mid-’90s, they would have killed Steve Austin’s push by chanting “Ringmaster” at him.

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