What Didn’t You Understand About Beaver Cleavage?

Beaver Cleavage was one of the most controversial gimmicks in WWE history

If there is one thing that is consistent with the majority of wrestling fans, it’s IMPATIENCE—wanting the payoff of EVERY storyline IMMEDIATELY. Not to WAIT for it, not to PONDER it, not to LET IT BREATHE, but rather to PAY IT OFF IMMEDIATELY.

That’s not the way I wrote TV, and not the way TV should be written. I’d like to think that I wrote a “Thinking Man’s Wrestling Show”, one that you had to follow, week, after week, to get the FULL UNDERSTANDING of what exactly happened and why. I know that’s the Television which I enjoy the most and I am a PROFESSIONAL Television Viewer.

So, Thrasher got hurt and he was going to be on the shelf for an extended period of time. Therefore, Mosh was left with his hand on his HOOZYWHATSIT. Yeah, Chaz Warrington could have become a “RASSLER” like everybody else, but I don’t do things that way. No, I like to go where no writer has EVER dared to go before—to actually come up with something new, edgy, daring, different and YES controversial.

Thus the birth of “BEAVER CLEAVAGE”.

Beaver Cleavage

Obviously a parody of “Leave it to Beaver”, on the surface Beaver and his mother Mrs. Cleavage, seemed to have somewhat of a different relationship. Yeah, man, a mother and son exchanging SEXUAL INUENDOS isn’t the NORM. But, if you really thought about it, if mom and son were indeed having an inappropriate relationship—you think they would LET THE WORLD KNOW? Absolutely not. It would be done in secret, behind closed doors, in the middle of the night—NOT OVER BREAKFAST.

So—in the “Wrestling World”, this would be known and Beaver Cleavage and Mrs. Cleavage WORKING THE AUDIENCE.

BUT-let’s dive deeper—shall we?

“Beaver Cleavage Is One Of The Most Uncomfortable Gimmicks In WWE History” — TheSportster

Don’t tell me you ACTUALLY THOUGHT they were Mother and Son? REALLY? BRO—THEY WERE THE SAME FREAKING AGE!!! There was ZERO Maternal Connection. NONE. Please don’t tell me you REALLY thought there was. PLEASE! This was all a PLOY. They wanted you to BELIEVE there was a “taboo” relationship going on, so as HEELS they could use this to their advantage to gain the upper hand at the right place at the right time against an innocent “White Bread Baby face”. YES—just like GOLDUST PLAYED on the Homophobic Fear of others—another brilliant characteristic that some wrestling fans STILL DON’T GET.

But, of course wrestling fans, being wrestling fans thought it was GROSS that Young Beav was doing his Mom, so immediately they CRAPPED ON IT, not giving it the Proper time to UNFOLD.

So now, you have Marks in the Office, Jealous of Vince Russo, getting in the ear of Vince McMahon asking, “WHAT IS THIS NEW YAWKER DOING!!!?” Now, I’m not one that is going to waste my very valuable time trying to explain to you and convince you where this thing is going. You either trust me, or you don’t. And, if you don’t—just scrap it. You’re loss—not mine.

So yeah—you never got to see where Beaver Cleavage and Mrs. Cleavage were going. What? You want to know NOW? Too late . . . I don’t do that job any more. You MISSED OUT—unfortunately.

You should have let it play out—now—you’ll never know!!!

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