Headlies: Triple H Promises To Stop Listening To NXT Crowd

16 Submitted by on Fri, 05 September 2014, 08:00

triplehnxt


Winter Park, FL – From his executive office at the NXT Arena at Full Sail University, WWE COO Triple H has promised to stop listening to the NXT live crowd.

“I couldn’t help it,” said a frustrated Triple H. “They just have so much energy and they love everything. All those chants and dancing. Everyone is a star down there! Unfortunately, I’ve come to find out the hard way that it doesn’t always translate to the main WWE crowd.”

Triple H’s musings are in reference to several wrestlers called up to the main roster who shined in NXT, but have flopped in varying degrees after being called up to the main roster.

“Remember when Adam Rose premiered at NXT?” reminisced Triple H. “The crowd went nuts. The chants of ‘That was awesome’ was intoxicating. Now his entrance goes off like an X-Pac fart in church. It seemed like a sure thing! Same thing with Paige’s current run. It’s like the average fan doesn’t watch every episode of NXT. Xavier Woods? Meh. Big E? Tepid. Bo Dallas? Geek salad with nerd dressing on the side. Don’t even get me started on Emma. I thought they’d all make a big splash.”

“I just trust people too much. I mean, just because Guy With Neckbeard In a Drew Gulak Shirt yells ‘Sawft!’ during an Enzo Amore promo doesn’t mean he’ll be a star. I should have known better than trusting Southern Granny With Jiggly Bingo-Arms just because she sways along during Bailey’s entrance. I’ve really had to resist the urge to call up The Ascension. I just love when the crowd chants ‘Yah!’ during their matches. It’s just so creative, but I’ll just have to assume that not everyone will do it. Breaks my heart really.”

“I just have to man-up and ignore them because, really, it’s their fault,” said Triple H as he gazed at a monitor showing the latest NXT taping.

“It’s what’s best for business…because…business…is…um…” said Triple H as he stared at a monitor showing the latest NXT taping. His voice began trailing off as chants of “Bull!” rang throughout the arena during the entrance of Bull Dempsey.

“Hmmm. Bull Dempsey? Yeah…yeah! The people love him!” exclaimed Triple H. “I think we could inject him directly into the Intercontinental title chase. That’ll give us enough time to build towards the Wrestlemania main…wait! No! No no no no no no! Stop it!” Triple H screamed at his monitor before covering his ears and shouting “Lalalalalalalala I am not listening lalalalalalala!”

Written by

From the Northeast by way of Parts Unknown. If you like horror movies, check out www.365daysofhorrormovies.blogspot.com
16 Responses to "Headlies: Triple H Promises To Stop Listening To NXT Crowd"
  1. Time Lord Soundwave says:

    “I just have to man-up and ignore them because, really, it’s there fault,”

    Probably more truth than fiction in that line.

  2. Fraser says:

    “I just have to man-up and ignore them because, really, it’s THEIR fault,”

    Please edit this so that the grammar is correct.

  3. Thomas Moffatt says:

    Do we take it that Mojo Rawley is getting a push now?

  4. Raging_Demons says:

    Heh. Jiggly Bingo-Arms.

  5. Forest George says:

    Does anybody think the whole Bella thing would be better if they just had Brie flip out, turn heel and change her name to Cheese? Also have Mongo McMichael return to be her manager. And also just have Cheese Bella talk about body slamming 700 pounds of Andre the giant?

  6. Steve Johnson says:

    He’s especially right about Bo Dallas. The nerd alarm goes off every time he comes out. Emma too. Who in the hell would ever think that dance is cool? In what dimension of the Twilight Zone is she popular in? This developmental program is bringing up some of the nerdiest characters this side of 1995. When are they going to debut the friendly garbage man or Nascar driver…or evil hockey player and plumber ?

    Lol.

    • Thomas Moffatt says:

      What they need to do is find the tough, most respected, most over legit hardman they can find and team him up with a leprechaun…

  7. Alexandru says:

    Actually some of what the crowd in NXT probably does get Triple H excited, but when he hears the tepid reaction from regular WWE fans to the NXT fans it does probably drive him nuts. I know it would drive me nuts

  8. Doc 902714 says:

    Actually back in the day it was believed to have been the fault of the “Superstars” themselves if a gimmick or ring persona never got over, never the promoter or promotion. I don’t care to see any more NXT brain farts on RAW or SmackDown with the exception of maybe, Charlotte Flair & The Ascension (just to spice up the tag team Division), Adam Rose is just terrible, Xavier Woods as the new Brodus Clay? Rusev and Lana have been okay. Emma looks dyslexic. And Bo Dallas (dressed in white) looks like the World’s Biggest Baby

  9. M. Walsh says:

    Thing about Emma is she started in NXT as a heel. She sold the stupid dance completely straight, and that’s what made it funny. (Also helped she could actually wrestle good matches).
    But on the main roster…..Santino. The end.

    They also botched Paige’s main roster debut. She got over in NXT as this badass anti-diva. On the main roster they made…..bland, rookie underdog. And again, like Emma, in NXT she was able to wrestle actual matches with women that could keep up with her–not 5 minute nothing matches against Alicia Fox with no storyline or promos.

    I’ll bet you anything they screw up Bayley when she debuts on the main roster.

    I never was into Adam Rose, but the second they had Michael Cole squealing with glee and dancing at the announce table, that gimmick was dead in the water.

    Rusev’s done okay…but that’s only because Vince always has a major hard-on for “evil foreigner” gimmicks.

    Bo Dallas actually amuses me. Especially that his gimmick is pretty much taking the piss out of overly inspirational ‘never give up’ babyfaces…..which is exactly what John Cena is.
    I wonder if anyone in the WWE has grasped that irony. I’m guessing no.

  10. chris says:

    While there is some truth to what Triple H is saying, a lot of the blame does not belong on the shoulders of NXT’s college crowds. A lot of the blame belongs firmly on WWE Creative for trying to “humble” new talent & writing angles that were never going to get them over with WWE’s mainstream crowd. If the “NXT fans” were really to blame, the number of failed WWE debuts would not be so widespread. When talent like Paige fails to get over, because you made her look weak & placed a title on her at debut match, that’s on WWE Creative. That’s not on NXT.

    That said, a number of silly gimmicks like Emma’s bubble dance & Lynch’s Irish dance won’t work in WWE. That’s where the “Public Enemy” phenomenon comes into play, in which you have a big fish in a small bowl thrown into a large body of water and it gets lost in the shuffle.

    They should consider airing NXT’s quarterly specials on national tv and start polling & asking the WWE fans to chime in about who they liked & disliked. That way they can figure out what’ll work behond NXT and how to book talent as they advance from developmental to the main roster.

  11. Geoff says:

    It’s a headlie. That is all

leave a comment