Headlies: TNA’S FORTUNES TURN WITH BOARDROOM SUGGESTION: “HEY, WHAT IF WE PUT ON A GOOD PRODUCT?”

0 Submitted by on Thu, 27 December 2012, 13:06

Text by Justin Henry; Photoshoppery by RD Reynolds
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TNA’S FORTUNES TURN WITH BOARDROOM SUGGESTION: “HEY, WHAT IF WE PUT ON A GOOD PRODUCT?”
By Justin Henry

Orlando, FL – After several years of being almost universally regarded as “a poor man’s WWE” and “a lousy excuse for a wrestling product that borders on aesthetically abusive”, Total Non-Stop Action has begun churning out a quality product over the last several months.

What is the secret to their burgeoning turnaround?

“We were having a booking meeting in January, and it was the usual ‘swerve here, use of old guy here, bad comedy skit there,” said Dave Lagana, one of the driving forces on TNA’s creative team. “So I just stood up and said, ‘Why don’t we just put on a GOOD product for once?”

According to Lagana, the room went silent.

“Everyone was staring at me, and Dixie asked me to explain what that entailed of. I shrugged and said, ‘I dunno, longer matches, storylines that connect week to week, push who the fans wanna see pushed, and create must-see TV.’ They looked at each other and all of them slowly nodded, as if they were beginning to comprehend. Everyone except Russo, who made pleading eyes toward me while mouthing ‘shut up!’ I think that MAY have been the turning point for the company.”

As for Lagana’s suggestions, not only were these previously foreign concepts met with greater fan appreciation through their consistent implementation, but the impact was immediately felt during the creative meeting.

“We got caught up in the revelations, like some kind of hysteria,” explained Bruce Prichard. So myself, Bischoff, Hogan, Dixie, Jarrett, and Borash all started chanting “DAVE! DAVE!” as if he were a visionary or savior. We carried him out of the office, still chanting, while Russo banged his head on the table, weeping openly.”

In addition to using Lagana’s ideas for change, TNA has also taken down the posters on the lobby walls that read, “THE STATUS QUO OWNS YOUR SOUL”

“In hindsight, we probably shouldn’t have let Mr. Russo hang those up,” explained Jeremy Borash.

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Justin Henry is WrestleCrap's inquiring newsman, thirsting for knowledge always. He enjoys the art of satire, as you'll find in many of his works here at WrestleCrap. Drop him a line on Facebook (http://www.facebook.com/notoriousjrh) and Twitter (http://www.twitter.com/jrhwriting)

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