POLL: 78% OF AMERICA’S CHILDREN WON’T ALLOW THEIR PARENTS TO WATCH WWE
By Justin Henry
Loudonville, NY – The Siena Research Institute recently conducted a survey of more than 12,000 American children between the ages of 9 and 14, regarding WWE programming, and whether or not they find it safe for their parents to watch.
The results may be of interest to Vince McMahon and World Wrestling Entertainment.
Of those surveyed, 78% said they refused to let their parents and guardians watch WWE programming, while 22% claim to have no problem with their mothers and fathers partaking in the child-like antics of John Cena.
“Look at what happened Monday with John Cena,” said Katie Dundel, an eleven year old fifth grader from Pine Bluff, AR. “He’s supposed to be really tough and a hero and he’s just yelling “LOSER” at John Lauradatis (sic). My mommy and daddy should be watching Game of Thrones or True Blood or Person of Interest, because those are for smarter grown-ups. I don’t want my mommy and daddy to be dumber from watching John Cena.”
“It’d be insulting to their intelligence to watch WWE,” said Blake McCorter, fourteen, from Glendale, AZ. “There’s a midget running around that used to be a leprechaun, a female manager who just screams a lot, and just really awful writing. Like, the dialogue that they speak is so stilted and awkward, no human being would ever speak the way they’re forced to. I mean, I can handle it because I’m fourteen and I’m prone to having low standards, but my parents should aim higher.”
Chris Presky, thirteen, of Newark, NJ, is among the minority, disagreeing with Katie and Blake.
“I’m cool with my parents watching WWE. Who’s to say that Raw and Smackdown are having a negative effect on them? Experts? Well, maybe they’re right, but my mom and dad are recovering crack addicts, and between Raw and Smackdown, that’s four less hours a week doing dangerous drugs, so I’m content with them rotting their brains in a legal way.”