Category Archives: Rants

You know, the area where we just complain like ninnies about things no one could possibly care about.

Newz: WWE being given golden broom, to honor the way in which crippler voldemort was swept under the rug

10 Submitted by on Tue, 08 October 2013, 13:44
  I’ve never liked the idea that, as a society, we get awards for being sensible and responsible. So WWE’s getting an award for the way in which it’s combated the concussion issue within their organization, though the source says “Major Award.” If it’s not a stocking-clad leg lamp delivered in a crate that says “fra-gee-lay”, I’ll be sorely disappointed. Continue Reading...
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NEWZ: According to Nipple H, Big Duthdee Committed a Pay-Win-Don’t

10 Submitted by on Thu, 03 October 2013, 13:12
  So Stephanie’s upset, apparently. It seems as though the “Bullada Wooooooods”, Dusty Rhodes, cut her off with an improvisational offering Monday night during the hard sell for the Battleground six man tag. Stephanie’s anger would seem to stem from not being able to deliver her pre-planned, well-crafted, linguistically-orgasmic line (so they’d have you believe). Seems to be part of Continue Reading...
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NEWZ: Doc Brown Ventura vs. The US Government, Part Million (Electric Boogillion)

7 Submitted by on Wed, 02 October 2013, 12:53
“NOW WAITAMINNIT MCMAHON! YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT OUR GOVERNMENT HAS OUR BEST INTERESTS IN MIND, AND WE SHOULD KEEP PONYING UP?! HAH! THEY WON’T DO ANYTHING TO PROTECT THEIR CITIZENS, BUT I’LL BET THEY KEEP HULK HOGAN’S PALM GREASED! THAT’S RIGHT, THE IMMORTAL PUKESTER, CHUMP HOGAN, AND HIS CORRUPT BUDDIES LIKE JACK TUNNEY ARE GETTING FAT OFF OUR Continue Reading...
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NEWZ: 364 Days Until We Induct Los Matadores

48 Submitted by on Tue, 01 October 2013, 15:24
  Unless RD gives us permission to waive that pesky ‘one-year’ rule. Tito Santana’s rolling around his grave. Well, actually, he’s not dead, and it’s not a grave, but he can roll around in the pit WWE dug to hold all of the cash Susan G. Komen’s forking over for their part in the ‘pinkwashing’ campaign. I’d say the very Continue Reading...
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Newz: Mr. Anderson Would’ve Signed with ROH, but Couldn’t Agree on a New Last Name

8 Submitted by on Mon, 30 September 2013, 14:34
  Some good news for TNA in the long, dark hallway that has been their 2013: Mr. Anderson will likely soon be re-signing¬†with the beleaguered company, which lessens the possibility of the company having to find a ham-fisted excuse to blame this on Bruce Prichard, as Brother Love-to-be-Incompetent was turfed months ago. Anderson’s one of the few ex-WWE talents within Continue Reading...
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Newz: Watcha Gonna Do When the Hulkster Finishes Up His Dates With YEWWWW?

19 Submitted by on Fri, 27 September 2013, 13:27
  So October 1 is the expiry date for the contract of one Terrence Bollea, Thunder Mixer Enthusiast/1-800-COLLECT Shillmeister. As of this moment, the Hulkster has not re-signed with the company. The financial situation appears to be part of the impasse, as with Brooke Hogan and Mickie James gone, Hogan’s watched the company part ways with a singer and his Continue Reading...
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NEWZ: Dolph Ziggler Would Suck on Win, Lose, or Draw, Because He Can’t Do Two of Those Things

13 Submitted by on Thu, 26 September 2013, 13:35
  Don’t look at me, WWE’s the one who apparently believes Dolph Ziggler can’t draw money. The Observer’s reporting that Dolph’s premature evacuation from the main event scene is due to his perceived lack of value as a draw, and has absolutely nothing to do with his unminced public comments about the flaws within the company hierarchy, NOPE NOSIREE BOB. Continue Reading...
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NEWZ: Goldberg Creates Streaks; Ryback Just Ends Them, Because Money

13 Submitted by on Wed, 25 September 2013, 20:16
  Take this with a grain of salt the size of the frames on Brodus Clay’s Mars Blackmon glasses, but internet scuttlebutt points at WWE maybe, possibly, kinda/sorta considering having Ryback be the man to break Undertaker’s WrestleMania streak. Apparently, the way he bullies catering personnel with his unmistakably bad-ass knit hat (that you can order off of WWE Shop Continue Reading...
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