Category Archives: Headlies

The latest pro graps newz you won’t get anywhere else. Because it probably isn’t true. Probably.

Headlies: MICHAEL MCGILLICUTTY TEARS SHOULDER WHILE DOING “BEHIND-THE-BACK” TOWEL TRICK / KAMALA MOWS LAWN

0 Submitted by on Thu, 27 December 2012, 12:17
Text by Justin Henry, RD Reynolds, and Sean Carless; Photoshoppery by Sean Carless and RD Reynolds Follow Justin on Facebook here and on Twitter here; Check out Sean on Facebook here and his website here MICHAEL MCGILLICUTTY TEARS SHOULDER WHILE DOING “BEHIND-THE-BACK” TOWEL TRICK By Justin Henry San Diego, CA – Michael McGillicutty has found it difficult to live up to the lofty legacy of his Hall of Fame father, “Mr. Perfect” Continue Reading...
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Headlies: EVAN BOURNE TAKES AJ TO SEE “SMURFS 3D”, RESISTS URGE TO HOLD HER HAND / STAUNCH OLD-SCHOOL FAN TAPES SUMMERSLAM ON SUNDAY, WON’T WATCH IT TIL LAST MONDAY OF THE MONTH

0 Submitted by on Thu, 27 December 2012, 12:15
Text by Justin Henry, RD Reynolds, and Sean Carless; Photoshoppery by Sean Carless and RD Reynolds Follow Justin on Facebook here and on Twitter here; Check out Sean on Facebook here and his website here EVAN BOURNE TAKES AJ TO SEE “SMURFS 3D”, RESISTS URGE TO HOLD HER HAND By Justin Henry Los Angeles, CA – WWE superstar/alleged adult Evan Bourne recently took in a screening of “The Smurfs: 3D”, and the Continue Reading...
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Headlies: MAN ACCUSED OF STALKING TAMINA ORDERED TO GET NEW PRESCRIPTION GLASSES / “CM PUNK’S CURRENT WWE TITLE REIGN IS THE GREATEST EVER!” ACCORDING TO INCLUSIVE POLL

0 Submitted by on Thu, 27 December 2012, 12:13
Text by Justin Henry, RD Reynolds, and Sean Carless; Photoshoppery by Sean Carless and RD Reynolds Follow Justin on Facebook here and on Twitter here; Check out Sean on Facebook here and his website here MAN ACCUSED OF STALKING TAMINA ORDERED TO GET NEW PRESCRIPTION GLASSES By Justin Henry Reading, PA – A widowed former postal clerk has been ordered in a Berks County court to not only stop stalking a particularly Continue Reading...
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Headlies: HILARIOUS HEY DUDE EPISODE CAUSES JOSH MATHEWS TO LAUGH UNCONTROLLABLY WHILE RECORDING SMACKDOWN / FAN UPLOADS ENTIRE 1999 EPISODES OF WCW SATURDAY NIGHT, “DOESN’T MIND” CREEPY MESSAGES FROM OTHER FANS

0 Submitted by on Thu, 27 December 2012, 12:11
HILARIOUS HEY DUDE EPISODE CAUSES JOSH MATHEWS TO LAUGH UNCONTROLLABLY WHILE RECORDING SMACKDOWN By Justin Henry Philadelphia, PA – Things got a little carried away at this week’s Smackdown tapings in the city of Brotherly Love. Josh Mathews, a WWE announcer long regarded for his professionalism and genuine love of his work, was unable to keep his composure during a Continue Reading...
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Headlies: RANDY ORTON ASKS TO BORROW “HEAT MACHINE” FOR USE IN DAILY LIFE / MATHEMATICIAN DEVELOPS “PWTORCH / TNA MATCH RATING SHORTCHANGE THEOREM”

0 Submitted by on Thu, 27 December 2012, 12:10
RANDY ORTON ASKS TO BORROW “HEAT MACHINE” FOR USE IN DAILY LIFE By Justin Henry St. Louis, MO – Former eight time World Champion Randy Orton hasn’t always been the most popular of champions, as WWE would prefer fans to believe, and even he admits that. “I don’t know where my career would be without Smackdown’s heat machine,” said Orton, Continue Reading...
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Headlies: DOCTOR THAT PERFORMED ROB CONWAY’S SEX CHANGE INTO EVE TORRES HONORED / MAN HACKS KURT ANGLE’S TWITTER TO POST REASONABLE, PLEASANT MESSAGES

0 Submitted by on Thu, 27 December 2012, 12:08
DOCTOR THAT PERFORMED ROB CONWAY’S SEX CHANGE INTO EVE TORRES HONORED By Justin Henry Malmo, Sweden – Dr. Georg Krausingaard, a pioneer in the field of gender reassignment, was honored this week at a luncheon near the Faculty of Medicine. Krausingaard, 77, has devoted his life to gender reassignment, known to the layman as “sex change operations”. Since the first Continue Reading...
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Headlies: IRS CASHES IN MONEY IN THE BANK BRIEFCASE FROM 1991, BEATS JOHN CENA FOR WWE TITLE / RUFUS DETWILER, MAN WHO PLAYED ‘ORIGINAL’ SCOTT STEINER, DEAD AT 46

0 Submitted by on Thu, 27 December 2012, 12:06
IRS CASHES IN MONEY IN THE BANK BRIEFCASE FROM 1991, BEATS JOHN CENA FOR WWE TITLE By Justin Henry Sydney, Australia – CM Punk, move over. Your soul-baring speech from Monday Night Raw has been dethroned as the most newsworthy wrestling story of the week. WWE Champion John Cena was scheduled to defend his gold against R-Truth, and R-Truth alone Continue Reading...
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Headlies: JOHN CENA DECLARES POOP “NO LONGER FUNNY” AFTER COUSIN’S TYPHOID DEATH / MAN THROWS ANGELINA LOVE ACROSS YARD, PROMPTLY RETURNED BY DOG

0 Submitted by on Thu, 27 December 2012, 12:04
Text by Justin Henry, RD Reynolds, and Sean Carless; Photoshoppery by Sean Carless and RD Reynolds Follow Justin on Facebook here and on Twitter here; Check out Sean on Facebook here and his website here JOHN CENA DECLARES POOP “NO LONGER FUNNY” AFTER COUSIN’S TYPHOID DEATH By Justin Henry For several years, WWE’s main event avatar, John Cena, has derived much mileage out of childish bathroom humor. To the consternation of veteran Continue Reading...
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Headlies: DOLPH ZIGGLER TO TAKE NICKY’S PLACE DURING FORTHCOMING SPIRIT SQUAD REUNION / NEXT SEASON OF TOUGH ENOUGH TO SEARCH FOR NEXT BARELY USED ANNOUNCER

0 Submitted by on Thu, 27 December 2012, 12:03
Text by Justin Henry, RD Reynolds, and Sean Carless; Photoshoppery by Sean Carless and RD Reynolds Follow Justin on Facebook here and on Twitter here; Check out Sean on Facebook here and his website here DOLPH ZIGGLER TO TAKE NICKY’S PLACE DURING FORTHCOMING SPIRIT SQUAD REUNION By Justin Henry Las Vegas, NV – World Wrestling Entertainment is known for its use of ‘classic characters’ on their television programming, usually to help lighten Continue Reading...
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Headlies: JEFF HARDY RETIRES FROM WRESTLING TO BECOME SANDWICH ARTIST / LANCE STORM CRITICIZES OWN REALITY SHOW ON HIS WEBSITE’S BLOG ROLL

0 Submitted by on Thu, 27 December 2012, 12:01
Text by Justin Henry, RD Reynolds, and Sean Carless; Photoshoppery by Sean Carless and RD Reynolds Follow Justin on Facebook here and on Twitter here; Check out Sean on Facebook here and his website here JEFF HARDY RETIRES FROM WRESTLING TO BECOME SANDWICH ARTIST By RD Reynolds and Justin Henry Vaas, NC – Visitors to Subway #19401 located inside the Hudson’s Food Mart were in for a shock this week as former WWE/TNA Continue Reading...
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