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The
early 2000’s saw a brand new “game
show boom” where English game show imports
made their way to the United States. The most
famous being Who Wants To Be a Millionaire?
(still on the air but sadly no more Regis
as host) and American Idol (sadly still on
the air and sadly Ryan Seacrest is still the
same host). These game shows brought old faces
and new characters into the spotlight, along
with catch-phrases that wore out their welcome
within a span of 15 minutes and making their
way into being referenced on every movie and
tv show you could name.
Another
British gameshow import that inspired the
catch-phrase craze everyone and their 90-year
old grandmother without a television used
was The Weakest Link. Like Idol, the show
featured a sardonic, venom-tongued British
host that spared no one’s feelings in
cutting a person down to feeling even smaller
than they appeared.
The
Weakest Link had Anne Robinson, a quick-witted
woman with short red hair that could make
you feel inadequate and useless. Boy, do I
feel sorry for whoever had the task of pleasing
HER.
When
I heard that the WWF “entertainers”
(I’ve been informed I cannot refer to
them as “superstars” anymore and
there‘s a brand new blur on WWE 24/7
to prove it) were going to appear on The Weakest
Link, I rubbed my hands together in anticipation.
Who would this sardonic British lady mock
with her biting British wit? Let’s meet
the contestants, won’t you?
WILLIAM
REGAL
Commissioner of the Alliance
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TRIPLE
H
"The Game, and yes, Kurt Angle’s
shirt is available at wwfshopzone.com"
Very nice of you to plug someone else's
merchandise there, Hunter.
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| STEPHANIE
MCMAHON-HELMSLEY
"Aka Billionaire Princess, AKA
co-owner of The Alliance". Co-owner
of The Alliance. There's another aspect
of The InVasion for me to once again
push to the back of my brain after I
stop mourning for ECW. |
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LITA
From
North Carolina
"From
North Carolina"? Yikes, that's
weak.
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KURT
ANGLE
Won gold medal in 1996 Olympics in
Freestyle Wrestling
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TRISH
STRATUS
Stratusfaction is Guaranteed, according
to the 2nd Mrs. Deal.
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BOOKER
T
5 Time WCW Champion
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THE
BIG SHOW PAUL WIGHT
Who proceeds to plug Kurt Angle's
book "It's True, It's True",
available in bookstores now...maybe.
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The
entire show would be entirely too
long to write up so I'm going to just
point out the answers that particularly
stand out as being incredibly smart.....or
incredibly foolish. More the latter
than the former.
Booker T particularly owns the first
round in terms of wrong answers.
For example, "On the tv show
Alice, Flo was known for
saying, 'Kiss my what?' Booker T guesses
"butt".
Seriously,
he said "butt", not GRITS.
Dude,
EVERYONE has said that at one time
or another with the exagerrated southern
accent.
Where's
Mel Sharples at when you need to call
someone "Dingy"?
(Note
from RD: I'm pretty sure Vic Tayback
is no longer with us.)
(Note
from Blade: I didn't even know he
was sick!)
(Note
from WrestleCrap Radio Crickets: chirp,
chirp.)
But
this one takes the cake.
"What October Federal Holiday
celebrates the discovery of America?"
Booker’s response: Thanksgiving.
Digest
that one with me, won't you?
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And
Big Show does not know that the theme
song that goes "a horse is a
horse of course, of course" is
from Mister Ed.
What
did he think it was from? My Mother
the Car?
Show
had a good excuse, though, as he rightly
stated "it was fifty years ago!"
That
would be a good excuse if Nick at
Nite and TV Land have been rerunning
it for the last TWENTY!
Come
on, dude, you’d have to have
at least flipped past it in mid-theme.
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Trish
gets a question in which the answer
is Rhinoplasty.
RHINOPLASTY.
No
offense to Ms. Stratus at all, but
I'm quite sure that there are plenty
of WWE Divas that are experts on various
aspects of surgical enhancement.
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Anne
gets in a great line at the end of
the round, “Who thinks WWF stands
for Without Wisdom FOREVAAAHH??!”
She
says it with such condescending snobbery,
I just love it! Because she is British...and
that accent is neat.
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Anne
asks Stephanie what her nickname is
again. “The Billion Dollar Princess”
Anne asks again, “Where’d
you get the money from?” Stephanie
replies ever so proudly, “My
daddy!”
Anne:
“Who’s your daddy?”
(tee hee)
Steph:
“Vince McMahon”
Anne:
“Never heard of him”
BURN!
“Where
are your muscles?” Anne asks.
“Here
they are", Stephanie says as
she points to her boobs.
Yeah,
those McMahon muscles aren't real
either.
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Anne
has words for Booker T's pitiful display,
“you’re not showing off
your muscles, and certainly not your
brain power. How’s your October
Thanksgiving?”
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The
Big Show is voted off in the first
round because the Mister Ed question
particularly irked the rest of the
players.
I'm
amazed Booker was not voted off for
the Thanksgiving answer but Booker
will once again impress us with his
amazing ability to answer the simplest
questions incorrectly.
"What French word meaning “again”
is often shouted at the end of a concert?"
Booker says “Oui Oui”
I'm
guessing Booker hasn't been to many
concerts where the audience demands
an ENCORE! ENCORE!
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Trish
is stastically the Weakest Link of
this round because she thought the
capital of Japan was Hong Kong (come
on, Trish, you can do better than
that).
But
Booker T is surely the Weakest Link,
so au revoir!
Anne asks Hunter who he’s married
to. Hunter says the Billion Dollar
Princess. “Marry her for her
money?”
“You’re
damn right!”
Hey,
he said it, folks.
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In
the next round, Hunter confuses F. Murray
Abraham for F. Lee Bailey.
One
was on OJ Simpson's Dream Team, one
played Antonio Saliere in Amadeus. I
can see how that would be confusing.
Actually
no, no I can't. |
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Angle
gets a Weekend At Bernie's question
and starts chuckling to himself.
I
don't know about you, but the image
of Kurt Angle watching Weekend At
Bernie's is probably more entertaining
than watching the actual movie.
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So
far, no one has voted for Hunter or
Stephanie to be eliminated. I wonder
why....
But anyways, Kurt is the next one
gone. He says he'll be surprised if
Lita makes it to the end because she's
more "laid back" than the
other ones.
Yes,
Lita is "laid back".
I'm
sure Lita has been "laid back"
plenty of times if you know what I
mean...AND I think you do.
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In
the next round, Trish gets a question
about which President said, “I’m
not a what?” There's a long pause.
Oh come on, Trish. You GOTTA know this
one!! EVERYONE knows this one!! More
pausing. Oh dammit, did the peroxide
go to your head, lady??!
“I’m from Canada, I don’t
know”.
Awkward. |
Everyone
votes for Trish. Only Trish has the
guts to vote for Stephanie. For that,
I want to go on record to apologize
for yelling at Trish.
Stephanie says, “She did sleep
with my father, which is why I voted
her off”. We need the Married
With Children laugh track here.
Alas, poor Trish is a goner. There,
there, Deal.
In the next round, Stephanie gets a
question about the XFL champions....and
gets it right! I guess that answers
the question about who was the one person
still watching towards the end. |
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Regal
gets a question about which magazine
published the naked photos of de-throned
Miss America Vanessa Williams...and
gets it wrong.
I'm sure my old pal Blade was yelling,
"PENTHOUSE!! IT'S PENTHOUSE!!"
at the television.
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Alas,
Lita is gone from this round, leaving
Regal, Hunter and Stephanie. I don't
like where this is going.
Sure enough, Anne's fellow countryman
is voted off, leaving Hunter and Stephanie
as the final two competitors.
I call WORK on this one.
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Alas,
Hunter bests Stephanie in a best out
of 5 competition and wins $48,000 for
breast cancer research.
Hunter says that now he has bragging
rights. |
Stephanie
says when they go home, there is BDSM
coming Hunter's way.
Very
shrill BDSM, I'm sure.
Yeeech.
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Overall,
I commend everyone for having the guts to
go out there and having to answer questions
on national television under pressure. And
we really can't say WE would've done a better
job until we've been in that situation.
But come on, Booker T.
THANKSGIVING???!
In
October???!
Somebody
get him a calendar for Christmas. |
